coerced you.”
She laughed incredulously. “But you did coerce me.”
He nodded. “But if you had the choice, right now, to walk away with all your debts forgiven — would you take it?”
“I’d be a fool not to.”
Nick closed his eyes. For a moment, he was twenty-two again, reacting to that first, unbelievable moment of betrayal. But Ellie saw a difference in the tightness of his jaw, in the way he sighed but didn’t grimace.
He had expected that answer, in a way he hadn’t expected her to leave him the first time.
“I’d be a fool not to,” she said again. “But perhaps I’d rather be a fool than a pragmatist.”
“Would you rather be a fool than a free woman?” he asked, opening his eyes. “What about all your vows to be your own mistress?”
“I can still be my own mistress. But I would enjoy it more if you were with me.”
Her heart caught in her throat. It was as close to a declaration as she could get.
It seemed to be enough for him. In an instant, he’d set aside the objects in his lap, stood up, and pulled her into his arms. Her cheeks were still cold from her carriage ride home. His hands burned against them. He looked dead into her eyes, as though he could read her soul.
“I believe you,” he said.
He kissed her before she could think. Her body responded for her. She was ravenous for him, as ravenous as he was for her, and she wasn’t satisfied with the firm, hard, vow-sealing kiss he gave her. She wanted that, wanted to feel like they’d branded each other — but at this point, brands were superfluous compared to the marks they’d left on each other’s souls.
She opened her mouth and he took her offering. It was like they were young again, kissing with all the fuel of their dreams behind them — enough fuel to burn away their regrets. She dug her fingers into his shoulders, urging him on as she felt him start to unfasten the buttons down the back of her dress. He had a long job ahead of them — but then, they had all night.
Their kisses turned shorter, more like sips of pleasure compared to the long, thirst-quenching draught of their first one. He finished with her dress. She slid his jacket from his shoulders. The rest of their clothing followed in the same pattern — hurried, but smooth, and with no concern for worship or winning.
“Why wasn’t it like this before?” she murmured against his lips before kissing him again.
He pulled her chemise up over her head, tossing it to join his trousers on the floor. “Don’t know. But if we’re fools for this, we were even bigger fools to avoid it.”
He picked her up and laid her out on his bed — their bed. No matter what happened after, she would always consider it theirs.
“Do you know, this is the first time I’ve ever taken a lover to bed?” she said.
His hand had found her thatch of curls, but he paused and looked at her eyes rather than her breasts. “Truly?”
She leaned up on her elbows and stroked her hand over his heart. “You and I never had a bed — all those pesky chaperones. So it didn’t seem…right, with the others.”
“And here I thought I wouldn’t have to work to make this good enough.”
He grinned as he dropped his lips to her breast. She fell back into the mattress, her own grin matching his. “Wouldn’t want you to get too complacent, my lord.”
“Never complacent, Ellie my love.”
His mouth closed over her breast, sucking lightly just as his fingers found the most sensitive place beneath her curls. She arched up, putting a hand on his head, sifting through his hair as though pillaging for treasure.
But the treasure she sought was already there, wrapped around her like a net of spun sugar, fragile and almost unbearable sweet. The Nick in her arms was the one she’d caught glimpses of the past few days, the witty, sardonic man who would laugh just for her. If she could keep his laughter, let it soak into her skin until, together, they lit up every last bit of darkness…
His fingers took on more urgency, and suddenly there was no room for thought. “I need you, Ellie.” He brushed a kiss across her lips. “I’ll need you until I die, in this life and every other.”
He moved against her as he said this, and there was no pause —