broken. He's been patient and wonderful through all of this.
"I love you," I tell him, holding tight to his hand. "I love you so much, T'chai."
"My Mari. My heart. Everything will be all right." He bends over and lifts my hand to his lips, kissing my knuckles.
And for the first time, I kind of believe it. No matter what happens now, I think we'll be good.
22
T'CHAI
I can feel Mari trembling as we enter the healer's hut. I know she is full of worry, but I am not. No matter what happens, she is my mate. It does not matter if my khui does not sing for her. I know the truth of it. In this, I have no fear.
But I want to hear good things, if only to make my mate smile again.
"There has been no progress since we last spoke?" M'lak looks to V'ronca.
"None. It's like everything I do falls into a void," V'ronca admits, her expression unhappy. "I've tried and I've tried, but I can't seem to make her khui wake up again." She makes a frustrated sound. "If I'd have known—"
M'lak raises a hand, her expression calm. "Do not tear yourself apart for a decision made to save someone. We all do the best that we can. We all have doubts. Many of my people died in a great sickness before I came into my healing. For a long time, I was angry with myself. Why did I not come into my healing sooner? If I had, would I have been able to save lives? It took me many, many turns of the seasons to be at peace with this." She reaches out and touches V'ronca's hand, and I am surprised to see that the human healer is weeping. "We do what we can to save a life, and we are not always entirely successful. This is just how the story goes. To be a healer is to always doubt you have done enough."
"It sucks," V'ronca says in a shaky voice, wiping away her tears. "I feel like I ruined Mari's life. Mari and T'chai both."
"I have a life," I say, speaking up. "With my mate at my side. Nothing is ruined." I look over at Mari and give her my proudest smile. "You will hear no complaints from my lips."
My mate gives me a sweet look. "We just want to try," she says to M'lak. "There's no harm in trying, right? It doesn't change how I feel about T'chai, or him about me."
V'ronca groans and shakes her head, swiping at her cheeks again. "And now I'm making you comfort me. God, I'm the worst. This is about Mari and T'chai. Not me. Let's just forget I said anything and concentrate on them."
"Of course." M'lak sits cross-legged next to my mate and puts her hand out for Mari to take. "This is new territory for me, as well. Resonance was so very rare before the humans arrived that even those that hated each other would still willingly go along with a mating because it meant new life, and we needed those lives so badly."
"Wellllll now I just feel worse." Veronica sighs.
"Hush," M'lak says, closing her eyes as Mari puts her hand into M'lak's larger one. "Let us see what we have."
I hold my breath as the healer quiets, unmoving. I look over at my mate, but Mari's eyes are closed, too, as if she can somehow help M'lak find answers. Each breath feels endless as we wait, and I keep my gaze locked on Mari, wanting to see some sort of response from her—a smile, a sigh, anything.
She remains tense, eyes closed.
When it seems an eternity has passed, M'lak lets out a small sigh and opens her eyes. She squeezes Mari's hand and looks over at my mate. "It is very strange."
"What?" V'ronca asks. "What did I do?"
M'lak thinks for a moment, then glances over at me. She puts her hand out and I automatically place mine in hers. Her brows furrow for a breath, and then she releases my hand again. "His khui is not as affected as hers. His is waiting for hers."
"Waiting for mine to do what?" Mari asks, her voice a whisper.
The healer makes a soft sound in her throat, then takes Mari's hand again. "All khuis sing a song to the world around them. They sing to a mate, but they are always…singing." She touches her chest. "A healer's khui sings to others so they can heal, for example. But Mar-ee's khui