in her direction.
«I'm sorry?» Phury asked. «What did you say?»
As she spoke, the Chosen's voice was lovely in the manner of wind chimes, sweet and melodic.
«If it would not offend, may I suggest the Chosen Amalya? She is warm and kind and of
appropriate seniority.»
Phury's yellow eyes went over the female, but his face was reserved, as if he wasn't sure what to
say or do with her. «Then that's who I want. Thank you.»
Her eyes lifted to his for a moment, a flush running pink in her cheeks. But then Phury looked
away and so did she.
«All of us are taking the night off,» Wrath said abruptly. «We need some regroup time.»
Rhage snorted from across the table. «You're not going to make us play Monopoly again, are
you?»
«Yup.» A collective groan rose up from the Brotherhood, one that Wrath ignored. «Right after
dinner.»
«I have something I have do,» V said. «I'll be back as soon as I can.»
«Fine, but you can't be the shoe or the dog then. They always go first.»
«I can live with that.»
Fritz came in with a massive baked Alaska. «Dessert, perhaps?» the doggen said with a smile.
As a universal, «Yes, please,» filled the room, John folded his napkin and asked to be excused.
When Beth nodded, he took off, heading for the tunnel under the grand staircase. The walk to the
training center didn't take long, especially as his gait was evening out and he was becoming more
comfortable with his body.
When he came out into Tohr's office, he braced himself as he looked around. The place really
hadn't changed since the brother's disappearance. Except for the fact that the ugly-ass green chair
was now in Wrath's study, everything was pretty much the same.
John went behind the desk and sat down. Strung across the thing were papers and files, some
marked with Post-it notes on which Z had written things in his deliberate way.
John put his hands on the office chair's arms, running them back and forth.
He hated the way he felt right now.
He hated that he was pissed off that V got Jane back, whereas Tohr had lost Wellsie forever.
Except it wasn't fair. And not just to Tohr. John would have liked a ghost of Wellsie in his life.
He would have liked the only mother he'd ever known to be around.
Except Vishous was the one who'd gotten the boon.
And so had Rhage. With Marry.
What the fuck made them so special?
He put his head in his hands, feeling like the worst kind of person. To begrudge someone
happiness and luck was a horrible thing to do, especially if you loved them. But it was so damn
hard to miss Tohr so badly and mourn Wellsie and-
«Hey.»
John looked up. Z was standing in the office, though God only knew how he'd managed to make
no noise coming through the closet.
«What's on your mind, John?»
Nothing.
«You want to try that again?»
John shook his head and glanced down. Idly he noticed that Lash's folder was on the top of a
pile, and he thought of the guy. Man, the two of them were on a collision course. The only open
issue was timing.
«You know,» Z said, «I used to wonder why me and not Phury.»
John looked up with a frown.
«Yeah, wondered why I was the one who got taken and ended up where I did. I wasn't the only
one. Phury still kills himself over the fact that it was me, not him.» Z crossed his arms over his
chest. «Trouble is, getting caught up in why something happens to one person and not another
never gets you anywhere.»
I want Wellsie to come back.
«I figured that's why you left.» The Brother rubbed a hand over his skull trim. «Here's the thing,
though. I believe there's a hand that guides us. It just isn't always a gentle one. Or one that seems
fair at the time. But I dunno, I try to trust in it now. When I freak, I just try to… shit, I guess trust
in it. Because at the end of the day, what else can you do? Choice only gets you so far.
Reasoning and planning, too. The rest… it's up to someone else. Where we end up, who we
know, what happens to the people we love… we don't have a lot of control over any of it.»
I miss Tohr.
«We all do.»
Yeah, John wasn't the only one who suffered. He needed to remember that.
«So I have something for you.» Z went over to a cabinet and opened it. «Phury gave it to me
yesterday. We were going to save it for your birthday, but fuck it. You need it tonight.»
Z