the kitchen washing the dishes. And then she showed up.” Ripley’s voice caught. “So what does Dad do? He ignores his girlfriend of eight months and runs to comfort his deserting addict wife. He’s so pathetic. They both are.” Ripley sniffled.
My throat was tight and my head buzzing; it was a huge effort to stay in the moment, to listen. “Ripley, I’m so sorry.”
“I know.” Ripley, usually sensitive to my feelings, clearly couldn’t detect my distress through the storm of his own. I couldn’t blame him. I knew how that went.
From my position in the alcove, I could see across the road to the mall. The lights in the parking lot were still on. I heard a car honk, but not from the street. From the phone.
“Where are you?” I asked.
“Walking down Imperial Highway,” he said. “I had to get out of there.”
“It’s past midnight.”
“I’m in Park Hills, Ellie. The worst that could happen is that I get busted for curfew.”
Across the street, faceless white mannequins stared at me from the Neiman Marcus window.
“Is there any way I can help?”
“Teleport here and take me to IHOP?” He gave a humorless laugh.
“It’s bad, huh?”
Ripley sniffled again. “Jude’s taking it harder than I am.”
I tugged at my hair, hoping the pain would keep me focused on Ripley instead of myself.
“Have you ever thought of taking him to Alateen?” I realized this was my version of pawning him off on the Suicide Prevention Lifeline, but it was all I could think to say. “It’s like AA, but for the kids of addicts.”
“I’ve heard of it. It sounds awful.”
“Yeah,” I said. “Probably is.” I felt like an idiot for bringing it up, as if I knew more about this stuff than he did. “What are you going to do?”
“I think I’m going to leave.”
“Like leave?”
“For a while, anyway. I hate to abandon Jude, but if I stay, I’m afraid I might . . . I don’t know. Melt down or something.”
A siren squealed, and I looked up. An ambulance was blowing through the intersection at Camelback Road.
“Is that a siren? Where are you?”
“Across from some mall.”
“You’re sleeping outside?”
“No, at a motel.”
“You guys splurged on a motel? Must be doing okay.”
“Not exactly.”
“What does that mean?”
“Nothing. You didn’t call to hear me complain. What about you? Where are you going to go?”
“My aunt’s, maybe. I’ll figure something out. But seriously, enough about my cliché family drama. Distract me with your woes.”
It was a relief to hear him say that, but I felt guilty anyway, filling him in on everything: The broken axle. The smashed props. Our dwindling cash supply.
Dad’s fury on discovering I’d agreed to do Flynn & Kellar’s show.
“Oh my God,” he said. His sniffles were gone; my misery really had distracted him. If that was my superpower, it was a shitty one. “If I had any money, I’d Venmo you.”
“I know.”
“And you’re sure he won’t do the show?”
“Completely.”
I walked to the corner, then crossed the street toward the mall’s main entrance.
Ripley asked, “What’s your plan?”
“I don’t have one,” I said, mounting the steps to Neiman Marcus. “The RV is dead. Our gear is gone. Even if I could book us a close-up gig, how would we get there? And we can’t afford to keep sleeping in motels. We’ll have to find a hostel, or a shelter, or . . .” My throat closed up.
“You’re crashing,” Ripley said.
I stopped on the top step. “How do you know?” Ella, ella, eh, eh, eh . . .
“Because Ellie Dante doesn’t give up. You’re relentless. This isn’t you talking. This is your illness. Did you get your meds?”
I felt tears welling up in my eyes and glanced around, as if anyone would be watching me on the steps of a closed mall at twelve thirty in the morning.
“Our insurance ran out.”
“And you’re out of pills? Totally out?”
“Yeah.”
“Since when?”
“A week? I don’t know.”
“How much are they without insurance?”
“Two hundred bucks.”
“Jesus.”
“I know.”
“Hey, wait. You said you’re at a mall in Phoenix? Which one?”
I looked up at the sign. “Fashion Square. Why?”
I heard rustling and clicking—Ripley was looking something up on his phone. When he spoke again, I could tell I was on speaker. “Okay, technically that’s in Scottsdale, which is part of the Phoenix metropolitan area but is in fact its own city.”
I squeezed my eyes shut; Ripley could be like this sometimes. “And this is important why?”
“Because that part of Phoenix is rich.”
I turned to glance through the glass doors. Ripley was right; it was a rich mall. I