he came and obviously wanted him. Right? Fuck, his brain felt like it was on a jerky carnival ride. Could he trust his own instincts? He suddenly wasn’t so sure.
“Is everything gonna be okay?” she asked in such an earnest voice that a lump formed in his throat.
“Of course. Rhys will never not be in our lives,” he replied, trying to sound hopeful and more parental but probably failing miserably. “He’s part of our family and will always be my best friend.”
“Really?” She sat back and wiped her eyes, seeming relieved. He wasn’t sure if it was because she wasn’t in trouble or because he’d promised that Rhys would be sticking around. She didn’t need any more loss in her life.
“How about worrying about your own stuff and letting Rhys and me work it out for ourselves, okay?”
“It’s a deal,” she said absently as she waved at some kid on the sidewalk, her face flushed rosy pink.
“Kevin?” he asked, trying to keep his voice even. Fuck, he’d almost forgotten about her crush.
She shrugged, already closing herself off from any intruding questions. “Gotta go.”
Then she was out of the car, leaving him to wade through the destruction from the bombshell she’d just dropped.
He arrived at work without even remembering how he got there, he was so preoccupied.
Thankfully he was able to immerse himself in his morning workload and lost track of time until Neil was suddenly standing near his desk, holding a bag from their favorite deli. “I have a lobster roll with your name on it.”
“You’re a lifesaver.” He pushed back from his desk and accepted Neil’s offering as he sat down in the seat opposite his desk and opened the bag. “On me next time.”
“No worries.” He handed him the sandwich, eyeing him warily. “You okay? Still have a lot on your mind?”
He sighed as he cracked open the soda that had been sitting untouched on his desk. He honestly didn’t know why Neil hung in there with him. “Sorry if I’ve been a shitty friend.”
“Nah, it’s okay. But I’m here if you want to talk.”
“Thank you. Just…things at home…” And then he couldn’t hold back anymore. He had no other adult to confide in besides Rhys. And Rhys was pretty much out of the question right then until Emerson got his thoughts in better order. “Before my friend’s accident, we…”
Neil quirked an eyebrow. “Had a thing?”
“God no.” He dipped his head as heat burst across his cheeks. He was essentially coming out to his friend, who obviously already had an inkling. “I was just discovering my own sexuality…”
“You mean you’re not straight?” Neil grinned as Emerson was flooded with relief. Who knew it would feel so good to get some shit off his chest. Without a doubt, he held on to stuff way too tightly. Why not share the load with someone who was willing to listen and was acting like a real friend?
“I think I’m probably demi?”
“Ah.” He chewed a bite of his turkey sandwich. “That actually makes a ton of sense.”
He bit back a gasp. “It does?” How was that possible when he couldn’t figure it out for himself for so long? But Neil was always well-read and pretty smart about a ton of things. He was a really interesting person if Emerson would only learn to appreciate him as a friend.
“Sounds like you fell for your best friend.” Neil shrugged, like it was the simplest thing in the world. “And if I had to guess… Never mind. I don’t want to overstep.”
Emerson wiped his mouth with a napkin. “No, go ahead. I’d like your opinion.”
“Okay…well, I’m wondering if something happened before his accident that maybe…” He winced. “He can’t remember now?”
Emerson’s mouth fell open. He felt so transparent. And so seen. “Fuck, you’re good at this.”
Neil chuckled. “Maybe I should go into psychology instead?”
Emerson motioned with his hand. “Or detective work.”
Damn, it felt good to laugh. His gut didn’t feel quite so hollowed out.
“So what’s the problem, besides the obvious?” Neil asked as he balled up his wrapper and shot it into the garbage can near the desk.
“It was a huge deal after being friends for so long and living across the street from each other our entire lives. We kissed, and then he ran out on me after Audrey walked in on us, and we never got the chance to have a conversation about what it all meant. All I know is that he freaked and left, and I can’t help wondering if he