Does that sound right?”
And even though I’m not completely sure who the new me is, I know that’s exactly what I would say. Sorting through the different timelines is starting to give me a headache so I ask, “Did he answer?”
She looks at me with twinkling eyes. “He did.”
I wait for her to finish. When she doesn’t I prompt her, “And?”
“He wrote one.”
“What did he do after he sent the text?”
She picks up my hand, patting it absently. “He started the car, drove home, and the next morning was waiting in your driveway to take you to school.”
“Wow,” I say. “That’s pretty cool.”
“That’s one way to put it. The two of you became very close.”
“Did we date? Because when he was Trevor, he was freaking hot, and if he turns out to look anything like that, I could see it happening.”
She shakes her head, but I see a glint of amusement sneaking into her eyes. “It’s amazing what having good friends can do to a person. By the time your senior year comes around, he will look like that, but you will never date.”
I groan. “What? Why not?”
“His heart will be won by someone else,” she says with finality.
Figures. I hope it’s not Felicity. “Since Trevor is alive and kicking, then, did Death Himself send you here to meet me?”
“Oh, I wouldn’t say that exactly. When I heard my granddaughter was the one causing a fuss up in the Afterlife, I came to find you.”
“Grams,” I say, giving her a hard look, “are you AWOL from Heaven?”
Without missing a beat she says, “Who says I went to Heaven? I was quite a hell-raiser, in my day, I’ll have you know.”
I study her carefully. “Nope. I’m not buying it. You probably had a VIP ticket waiting for you when you arrived.”
She laughs again, the sound wrapping me in a cocoon of happiness. I lean back against her, wishing I was small enough to climb onto her lap just so I can be a little closer to her. “Hey, Grams,” I say, still feeling the tingle of joy on my skin. “I was wondering something.”
“Hmm,” she murmurs, absently stroking my hair.
“Were you proud of me?”
I expect her to laugh but she doesn’t. Instead, her hand freezes in place. “Well …” she starts, but her words trickle off.
The warm air is chilly now. I sit up straight, a strand of my hair catching on her fingers. “Grams?” I whisper. Her hesitation cuts me like a knife.
She snaps out of her thoughts and stands up. “Here’s the thing about the Afterlife. Once you cross over, you can’t lie. Not even white lies.”
“So you weren’t proud of me,” I deduce.
“The truth is never simple,” she begins. “I’m proud of the woman you are becoming now, but the girl you were before your death made it harder to stand up and cheer for you.”
I don’t need a pulse to know that my heart is breaking—no, crumbling. Grams, my rock, the one person I thought would never turn on me is now telling me she doesn’t like me. Or didn’t like me, and all I can say is, “Oh.” What else is there?
She sits back next to me and takes both of my hands in hers. I try to pull them away but she’s stronger than I remember. “I know it sounds bad, and if I could lie, I might be tempted. But you have to realize, the woman you were turning into was selfish and mean. I know it’s not all your fault, but sweetheart, it’s true. I love you more than anything. I always have. But you asked the question and I can’t lie.”
“You already said that,” I say flatly.
She lifts my chin, forcing me to look at her. “Whether you know it or not, you’ve made some pretty big changes in your life. First, you stood up to a bully who was bigger than you. By doing that, you started to develop the courage to stand up to your friends, which is much harder. I can’t begin to tell you how much those two choices have changed you.”
“So now that I’m someone different, you love me more?” I ask, turning my back to her.
But Grams won’t let me get away that easy. She spins me around, refusing to let me ignore her. “You listen to me, young lady. Do not for one moment think that I didn’t love you. I always have and I always will. That has never changed. But that was not