Anything I made was from scratch, and Christian could never get enough. Maybe I’d whip up a strawberry rhubarb pie. My Gamma had taught me to bake several of her award-winning pies and cakes over the years, and Christian was her number one fan.
It was then I noticed the piece of green sea glass propped up against my monitor. I picked it up and rubbed the smooth stone between my fingers, wondering where it had come from. It was beautiful, about the size of a half dollar and smooth all around, as if it had spent years tumbling against the harsh sand at the bottom of the ocean just so I didn’t cut my fingers as I held it. It twinkled as I held it to the light—like looking into a kaleidoscope. Stones like this were rare anymore, unless you bought one made in China from a tourist trap. I knew this one was natural, and very special.
I set it down on the desk next to me, wishing I knew where it came from. As soon as I logged on to my computer, it pinged, letting me know I had an email. It was from Grant.
“Thought about you when I found this on Friday. Hope you had a good weekend. Grant.”
I picked the glass up again smiled, watching as the fissures made it sparkle in the light. It reminded me of Grant’s eyes. They were almost the same color, just like mine. I touched it to my cheek, enjoying its cool touch against my flushed skin.
Suddenly, I dropped it when I saw the flowers out of the corner of my eye. No, I should not be rubbing this stone against my skin imagining it was Grant’s touch. That was wrong. How would I feel if some girl gave Christian a present? I started to throw it in the trash but couldn’t do it. I settled for the back of the desk drawer instead and moved the flowers closer to me. I’d hoped the physical gesture would be repeated in my thoughts and place Grant in the background. That was the right thing to do, right?
After tucking the stone safely away, I pulled out my phone and texted Christian.
Thank U for the beautiful flowers!! Can U meet me 4 lunch? I miss U!
My phone buzzed within a minute.
Christian: UR Welcome. But no, sry. I’m not even in town.
I groaned.
Me: Where RU?
Christian: Jax. Band got a gig. Left 1st thing this morning. We’ll B here all week.
Well, there went my plans for having a romantic night to say thank you.
Me: What about this weekend?
Christian: Not sure we’ll B back. I’ll let U know L8R
I sighed and resisted the urge to throw my phone. I knew this gig was important to him, but I also really wanted time alone with him to remind me of how great we were together and how much I loved him. We’d barely seen each other since the summer started.
I sat for a few minutes and realized I was being clingy. This wasn’t his problem. It was mine. After almost four years together, it was silly of me to expect to spend every minute with him. And I couldn’t take it out on him. It wasn’t fair. I texted him back.
K. Luv U babe. Call me 2nite
I needed to be in charge of my own emotions. I was finished with the “woe is me” whining. We’d been together for almost four years. We were good. We were strong. We could get through a stupid crush that meant nothing.
At lunch that afternoon, I sat in the break room with Temperance and a few other girls from a different department. They were all at least in their mid-to-late twenties. I didn’t know their names, but I’d waved hello every morning as we passed by. I really didn’t feel like eating alone today.
“I still think I’m hung over from Friday,” the shorter redhead started. She stirred her instant soup and laid her head on the table.
“I told you to stop drinking so much, Tonya. I don’t know what you were trying to prove,” the other chided.
“I needed some liquid courage. I thought it was a perfect chance to finally get Grant to notice me.”
My eyes shot up at the mention of his name, and I stopped breathing. Damn it! I had just told myself to knock this off, and not a few hours later I was at it again.
“And how’d that work out for you?” the other girl laughed.
“Ugh, it was