struck by all the trouble she'd gone through for me. Ever since she'd identified me as a potential magic user, I'd done nothing but resist her and even be antagonistic.
"Thanks," I told her. "For everything . . . I wish there was a way I could make it up to you."
She set her cup down and stirred in more sugar. "I'm happy to do it. There's no need to reciprocate. Although . . . once this is all over, I'd like very much if you'd meet my coven. I'm not asking you to join," she added quickly. "Just to talk. I think you'd find the Stelle very interesting."
"Stelle," I repeated. She'd never called them by name before. "The stars."
Ms. Terwilliger nodded. "Yes. Our origins are Italian, though as you've seen already the magic we use comes from a number of cultures."
I was at a loss for words. She'd gone to so much trouble for me . . . surely it wasn't a big deal just to talk to the other witches, right? But if it was such a small thing, then why was I terrified? The answer came to me a few moments later. Talking to others, seeing the larger organization, would kick my involvement with magic up to the next level. It had taken me a long time to come around to the magic I already used. I'd overcome many of my fears, but some part of me treated it as just some sideline activity. Like a hobby. Meeting other witches would change everything. I would have to accept that I was part of something so much bigger than just the occasional dabbling. Meeting a coven seemed official. And I didn't know if I was ready to be considered a witch.
"I'll think about it," I said at last. I wished I could give her more, but my protective instincts had seized me
"I'll take what I can get," she said with a small smile. Her phone chimed, and she glanced down. "Speaking of the Stelle, I need to talk to one of my sisters. I'll meet you at the car." She finished her coffee and headed outside.
Adrian and I followed a few minutes later. I was still troubled about the coven and caught hold of his sleeve to keep him back. I spoke softly.
"Adrian, when did I reach this point? Trying to crack open the Alchemists and practicing magic in the desert?" Last summer, when I'd been with Rose in Russia, I couldn't even tolerate the idea of sleeping in the same room with her. I'd had too many Alchemist mantras running through my mind, warning me of vampire evils. And now, here I was, in league with vampires and questioning the Alchemists. That girl in Russia had nothing in common with the one in Palm Springs.
No, I'm still the same person at heart. I had to be . . . because if I wasn't, then who was I?
Adrian smiled at me sympathetically. "I think it's been a culmination of things. Your curious nature. Your need to do the right thing. It's all led you to this point. I know the Alchemists have taught you to think a certain way, but what you're doing now - it's not wrong."
I raked my hand through my hair. "And yet, despite all of that, I can't bring myself to have one tiny conversation with Ms. Terwilliger's coven."
"You have boundaries." He gently smoothed one of my wayward locks. "Nothing wrong with that."
"Marcus would say it's the tattoo holding me back."
Adrian dropped his hand. "Marcus says a lot of things."
"I don't think Marcus is trying to deceive me. He believes in his cause, and I'm still worried about mind control . . . but honestly, it's hard to believe I'm being held back when I'm out here doing stuff like this." I gestured outside, to where Ms. Terwilliger was. "Alchemist dogma says this magic is unnatural and wrong."
Adrian's smile returned. "If it makes you feel better, you actually looked natural out there - back in the park."
"Doing . . . what? Throwing fireballs?" I shook my head. "There's nothing natural about that."
"You wouldn't think so, but . . . well. You were . . . amazing, throwing that fire like some kind of ancient warrior goddess."
Annoyed, I turned away. "Stop making fun of me."
He caught my arm and pulled me back toward him. "I am absolutely serious."
I swallowed, speechless for a moment. All I was aware of was how close we were, that he was