up and get you to the sofa."
"Ava, you should go in and make that tea. That poor man. What must he think of this household?"
"Don't worry about Duncan." Ava helped Essie to the sofa. "Are you cold?"
"No, I'm fine now. I-" She passed a hand over her face and grimaced at the sweat. "Look at me! Like I had the mother of all hot flashes."
"I'm going to get you a cool cloth."
"I couldn't stop it," Essie told Phoebe when they were alone. "I know."
"You wish I'd take the medicine, but most of the time I'm fine the way things are. I was just so worried. We were both so worried. Then wouldn't you know when you're home and I know you're safe, I have a spell like that."
She reached out, touched Phoebe's face. "Something very bad happened."
"Yes, something very bad. Mama, I've got some of the pills. You could take one. I don't want you upset."
"I'm all right now. You said Carly and Carter and Josie weren't hurt. Or Dave?"
"Dave's fine."
"Okay. Okay. I'll be all right with anything else."
Ava came back with a small white basin and a damp cloth. "You better sit down, Ava."
She told them about Roy. Though Essie's face went sheet white again, she didn't have another attack. She and Ava sat together on the couch, gripping hands. Duncan said nothing when he came in, just passed around the tea, then sat while Phoebe finished.
It was Essie who rose to sit on the arm of Phoebe's chair. She put her arm around her daughter's shoulders, eased Phoebe's head against her and stroked.
"Oh, Mama."
"I'm sorry, baby. I'm so sorry. What a terrible thing. Poor Roy. Poor Roy. The man was useless as tits on a bull, but he didn't deserve to die like that."
"Mama!"
"People who say not to speak ill of the dead are hypocrites, because you can take it to the bank they're thinking ill."
Essie looked over, saw Duncan struggling against a grin. "And look at you, just worn out, too, aren't you? But the house is all locked up. Locked up tight and we're safe inside it. You need to rest awhile."
"Yes, we all need to rest." Phoebe took Essie's hand. "I'd never let anyone hurt you."
"We'll all go rest. Duncan, you're going to stay. It's safe in the house, so you'll stay. Come on, baby girl. Duncan's going to stay in with you so you're not alone. You'll sleep better."
When Phoebe lifted her eyebrows, Essie just shook her head and continued to walk her out of the parlor. "As if I had no idea the two of you haven't found your way into bed together already. Sun's going to be up before long. We'll all get some rest. We'll have a late breakfast." Ava nodded at Phoebe over Essie's head, then slid an arm around Essie's waist. "Eggs Benedict? Won't that be fine, Essie? And fresh berries." Phoebe sighed as Ava walked her mother down the hall to Essie's bedroom. "She's closed the worst of it out of her mind for a while. It's too big right off, so she keeps it out."
"Sounds like a healthy idea to me."
Phoebe turned into her bedroom. "If she can keep her mind on something else like eggs Benedict, she won't panic. But eventually, it'll claw its way in."
"Phoebe."
She sat on the edge of the bed, looking up wearily as she pulled off her shoes.
"I'd say what happened tonight, and the overall threat of what could happen? That earns a good dose of panic."
"Hard to argue. God. I'm too tired to get undressed." She simply lay down on top of the spread, curled on her side.
Duncan slid in behind her, spooned her. "Didn't expect our first overnight would end up with us both fully dressed."
"Duncan? I want to say that I appreciate the fact that you shovel away the crap when I get into one of those get-away-and-let-me-dothisall-by-myself spells."
He smiled into her hair. "I'm going to buy a couple of spare shovels tomorrow."
"That sounds like a good idea." She took his hand in hers, pressed it between her breasts.
And within moments, Essie proved right. Phoebe did sleep better with him there.
Chapter 23
With Carly curled in her lap, Phoebe rocked and stroked as she used to when Carly was a baby. She knew what it was like to lose a father, to be told he was gone and never coming back. The hitch and jolt of it, the impossibility of the concept of death and forever to a child.