people yelling but I don’t want you to change who you are.”
He smiled and reached out to cup her cheek. “Wouldn’t hurt for me to think before I react. That’s something I’ve got to work on. You’ve got to work on opening up. Talking to me. Letting me in.”
She nodded. “I’ll try.”
“Right, enough serious talk. Let’s feed you and get the two of you to bed.”
She still didn’t think she could eat.
He opened the lids of the containers to reveal soup. The smell coming off it actually made her mouth salivate. She couldn’t remember the last time that food was appetizing.
“Where did you get this, Daddy?”
He placed one bowl in front of her. It looked like chicken noodle soup. Yum. The plate held warm buttered bread. He then handed her a spoon.
“There’s a restaurant about a block down. The owner, Calla, does amazing home-cooked meals. Eat.”
She tried to. She really did. But even under the soft blanket with her elephant pressed close to her, and Ink just inches away she couldn’t stomach more than a few bites before her stomach started to ache. She put the spoon down, aware of Ink’s frown.
“What do you think I should call him, Daddy?”
“I don’t know, button. But I do know that wasn’t enough to eat.”
She sighed. “I can’t fit in anymore. It hurts. I think it’s just stress.”
He nodded. “Then maybe during meal times, Daddy will take over, hmm?”
She gave him a cautious look. “I don’t know.”
“I do,” he replied firmly. He sat his own plate down then patted his lap. “Come here, button.”
“You should eat first. It will grow cold, Daddy.”
“I’m gonna count to three. If you’re not sitting on my lap before I get to three then tomorrow, you’re going to be spending some time in timeout. With a red bottom. One.”
He didn’t even get to two before she moved. Albeit not that fast since she was still sore as hell. The bath had helped but she still thought she was going to wake up feeling like she’d been run over by a truck.
She settled on his lap and instantly a feeling of home stole over her. Protected. Cherished. He wrapped the blanket around her carefully, just reinforcing those feelings. Reaching over, he spooned up some soup.
“Eat for Daddy, button.”
She clutched her elephant closely. “Not hungry, Daddy.”
“Just a bit. To make Daddy happy.”
Well, she could hardly refuse to do that, could she? She took the small mouthful. He held up some more. She shook her head, frowning slightly.
“Button, open for the train. Choo-choo! Chugga-chugga!”
She couldn’t help but laugh as he made train noises while moving the spoon closer and closer to her mouth. She opened up as he slid it into her mouth.
“Open wide for the airplane! Here it is, coming into landing!” She opened up as the spoon grew closer, shocked that he didn’t spill a drop. No way could she do that.
In the end he managed to get several spoonsful of soup into her that came from a car, a shark, a boat and a hot air balloon before she really thought she might be ill if she ate anything more. After brushing her teeth, he tucked her up into bed.
“You’re not leaving, are you?” She grabbed his wrist.
“No, button, I’m going to sleep on the couch.”
Sleep on the couch? Why would he sleep on the couch?
“Why? Don’t you want to sleep with me?” She could hear the hurt note in her voice but she couldn’t stop it.
He groaned. “Button, I want nothing more. But I haven’t slept in a few days and I’ve been fucking stressed out.”
“Isn’t that all the more reason to sleep in the bed rather than the couch?”
He let out a breath. “Sometimes when I’m over-tired or stressed, I have nightmares. I don’t want to accidentally hurt you while I’m dreaming.”
“Nightmares about what?”
“About my time in the Special Forces,” he told her.
“That last mission?”
He nodded.
“Is there anything that helps?”
“When I get too stressed, I need to feel more in control. That’s often the times I end up at Fringe. Because I can take control there. Touch, feeling close to someone also helps,” he admitted quietly as though worried she might be hurt by that admission.
“Then sleeping beside me should help,” she told him.
“I don’t know, button. I don’t want to risk hurting you.”
“You won’t,” she told him. “I know you won’t. And you can hold me and maybe that will keep the nightmares away. Please. I…I have my own nightmares.”
She knew it was a bit