breath and tried to think rationally.
“First off, the only one ruining relationships around here is you. You’ve cut off me, Xander, and I’m assuming Kieran, unless you two have been getting together on your own.”
When Bailey remained stubbornly silent, I continued on.
“And second, we are not just fucking. This is serious. What is happening here is not some fling we thought might be fun. We realize we might’ve gone about this the wrong way by keeping it from you—”
“Oh, how kind of you.”
“But it was none of your fucking business. We were going through something traumatic, something that brought us closer than most will ever understand, and we wanted to make sure it was real and true before anyone else had an opinion. I’m sorry that hurts you, but it’s the truth.”
“So I’m just supposed to be happy and accept that my straight brother and ex-boyfriend lied and went behind my back because they wanted to work out how deep this thing really went?” Bailey shook his head. “You hid it because you knew how much damage this would cause. You knew, and didn’t want to deal with it, just like everything else in your life.”
Wow, low fucking blow. “Look, I know you’re angry, and you have every right to be. But is acting like an asshole really helping? You’re killing Xander with this bullshit silent act.”
“Then maybe he should’ve thought about that before he decided to trip over your dick.”
I cursed and shoved a hand through my hair, turning away from him before I did something stupid, like punch him in the face.
“When did you become so cruel?” I whispered, before I even knew I was going to say it.
“I’m not being cruel. I’m being human, Sean. This is what happens when you screw someone over. They get pissed off. They get hurt.”
I shut my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose. This was getting us nowhere, absolutely fucking nowhere. He was too angry and I was too defensive. That wasn’t a recipe for forgiveness; it was a recipe for trouble.
“Is there anything I can say to make this better, that can get us back on track? Or am I just wasting my time here?”
“You can tell me that you and Xander decided this was the dumbest thing you’ve ever done and that it’s over.”
My stomach revolted at the thought. “And that would make it all better? Just like that?”
“No. But it would be a start.”
He was serious, too. I could see it in his eyes. “You’d really do that to him? After everything he’s been through over the last few weeks, you’d make him choose between his best friend and his boyfriend?”
“Boyfriend? Not sure if he’s told you this, but Xander, he likes variety.”
I knew he was trying to hurt me as much as I’d hurt him. But somewhere along the way, Bailey must’ve forgotten who he was fighting with—because I was the king of fighting dirty.
“Maybe that was the case when he was with you, but as far as I know, he’s not looking anywhere else.”
“Fuck you, Sean.”
“Hey, you started it.”
Color flooded Bailey’s cheeks as he marched past me, slamming his shoulder into mine as he walked over to the window. My blow had hit hard.
As we stood there in stony silence, the tension that had been at an all-time high finally began to fizzle out, and what was left was an overwhelming sadness. A feeling of loss similar to that of a loved one, and we both knew how that felt.
“Bay,” I started again, this time lowering my voice. “Come on. This is getting us nowhere. We have to talk about this sooner or later.”
“I…I can’t, Sean. I—” Bailey bit off his words as though trying to control the flood of emotions taking over. “I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to talk about this, and that’s all I can give you right now.”
Well, that was honest. “Okay.”
I shoved my hands in my pockets and headed for the door, then stopped to look back at Bailey. His shoulders were slumped as though he’d just gone three rounds with a heavyweight champ and lost spectacularly.
But the truth of the matter was no one had really won, had they?
“Bailey?”
Bailey glanced over his shoulder, and the heartbreak in his eyes was so gut-wrenching that it almost brought me to my knees.
“I’m sorry we hurt you. That’s the last thing we ever wanted.”
He said nothing, just stared at me with those bleak, glassy eyes, and before I changed