sexual tension was thick enough to cut.
Now, it comes rushing back, making my voice breathy as I add, “I mean, there comes a time when you want to play with . . . a friend. You know?”
“I do know,” he rumbles softly, inching a little closer, moving behind me. “I absolutely fucking know. But do you, if you aren’t sure why you’re feeling what you’re feeling?”
His questions are valid to a degree.
But my uncertainty has nothing to do with him.
It’s an amorphous Big Life Questions uncertainty.
There are zero questions about Jesse Hendrix.
Especially right now, right here, with art and anticipation in the air turning me on.
“I’m unsure about some things,” I say softly, perhaps as an invitation. “Not about others.”
“What are you sure about?” he asks, his voice low and smoky.
“I know what I’m feeling about this.” I press against him, molding my back to his front, my heart stuttering as I feel the thickening behind the fly of his cargo shorts. He still wants me, and I want him more than I’ve ever wanted . . . maybe anything except to be whole again.
I circle my hips, rubbing against his erection, electricity shooting across my nerve endings as his lashes flutter and a soft grunt escapes from low in his throat.
I smile. “You grunt when you’re turned on.”
“Which is way more normal than grunting when you’re thinking,” he says, his big hand molding to my ribs beneath my breast, making my heart beat faster as he pulls me even closer.
“Good thing I don’t want to be normal,” I say, my nipples tightening in my bra and every inch of me aching for more of his touch.
“You couldn’t be if you tried,” he says, husky. “You’re extraordinary.” His other hand drops to the bottom of my overall shorts, his fingers skimming beneath the hem, caressing the curve of my ass just below my panties. The feel of his bare skin on mine is enough to make the room spin. “But are you sure?”
“So sure,” I say, my breath coming fast as I turn in his arms, smoothing my palms up his chest to link my wrists around his neck. My body celebrates as my tingling nipples press against his firm muscles. “Are you? Did you sleep on it?”
I tense as I wait for his answer. He’s the one who applied the brakes last night.
His hands roam up my ass, cupping my cheeks, and that sure feels like a yes, I slept on it and want to have you all to myself right now.
He pushes against me. “I did. And then I saw you with that douche nozzle.”
I laugh, both nervous and curious. “And?”
He squeezes my ass hard. “And I felt possessive. And jealous. And I want you all to myself. So, yes, I’m sure.”
I breathe a sigh of relief. Or maybe it’s a turned-on sigh, since I’m aching for him.
That’s partly because we’re talking about what we want. We aren’t simply humping, though I do want to do that. Very much.
But the conversation makes me tingle.
It’ll make what comes next even better.
“Good. Me too. And I know you’re leaving, and I know things will go back to the way they were between us after you go, but for now . . .” My tongue slips out to wet my lips. “I just want to feel good again, and I want to make you feel good. We’ve had enough pain, Jesse. I think we deserve pleasure—don’t you?”
That’s the heart of the matter, the thing I’ve landed on. It’s the list effect, and the list is about good things in life.
Sex with someone you care about—and of course we care about each other—has got to be a good thing.
“You do, for damned sure.” He keeps one hand on my ass while the other roams up to my hair. His fingers thread into the strands and make a light fist, sending my blood zooming beneath my skin all over again. “You deserve all the pleasure, and I’m going to give it to you. But I have one rule—if this interferes with the list, we stop. The list comes first.”
I nod slowly, holding his hooded gaze as I say, “As long as I’m coming second.”
He curses beneath his breath, and his lips twitch up at the edges. “You’re sexy as fuck. You know that?”
I grin, and my heart stretches its wings, gives them an experimental flutter.
Maybe I am sexy. Maybe I am irresistible.
At least, I am in this moment, with this man.
And what do