trimming split ends off. Which, to be fair, is what I’ve been happy with. But I don’t come out feeling all swishy-haired and fabulous.
‘I’ll ask Sadie. Nx’
I am safe. One hundred per cent safe on the ‘he’s got no interest in me’ front. Unfortunately, I’ve still got a few issues with getting my imagination under control. But I suppose fantasising about him is okay, if I know that it is completely one-sided. Which I do know. So nothing will happen. Even if I sort-of wanted it to. Which I don’t.
‘Sadie?’ Okay I know it’s none of my business, but I’m still slightly miffed if he meant what he’d jokingly said, that he had plenty of days to proper date around our lessons.
Although I suppose I am being a bit hypocritical here – I’m going to be off dating other people as soon as I’m ready. Which hopefully will be soon. I’m running out of time.
‘Went out with her on Friday. Hang on. N x’
Oh. Right. I try not to be cross. But what’s Sadie like? Is she prettier than me? I bet Sadie isn’t direct and challenging. Or over-bubbly.
I’m beginning to think he’s disappeared off to see Sadie. The texts seem to have stopped. She probably gets several kisses on her texts, not just one.
‘Okay. Sadie’s given me the number of the guy she uses, said he was good at sexy-seductress stuff. N x’
‘You told her!!!’
Oh my God. The swine! Now Sadie knows he’s been enlisted to help out poor desperate dating disaster me. Is he going to tell everybody? I want to send an emoticon that says ‘I will kill you’ but can’t find anything even close, so send a devil face instead.
‘Chill. Said my sis was after a new sexy style, she mentioned him, I said yeah but can he do sexy? She kicked me and said, “what the fuck do you think mine is?” She also said “since when do girls ask for their brother’s help?!” I think I’ve been dumped, solves the problem of her thinking we might get serious! But I did get the hairdresser’s number first. Here it is. N x’
‘I am impressed at your devotion to the task, and the sacrifice. R x’
‘Not a problem. She was a bit scary, as in “can I move in?” scary, not scary like you. We’d only had one date! N x’
‘You always have to spoil it, don’t you? You’re supposed to say I was worth the sacrifice! R x’
‘Always!! N xx’
I think I better stop texting. So instead, I call the hair stylist and make an appointment; apparently if Sadie recommended him then he can squeeze me in on Wednesday.
Noah has sent another text, seeing as I didn’t reply. It consists of three crying with laughter emoticons and no kisses. Phew! Two kisses had definitely been scary.
‘Hope you’re not doing anything too drastic? I like your hair as it is! N x’
‘You’ll have to wait and see! R x’
‘Tousled, bed hair?? Nx ’
‘Red, pixie cut? R x’
There is a long pause. He’s obviously trying to think of a suitable not-too-crushing response.
‘Anything would look good on you! N x’
‘You charmer, you! Might get matching nails as well! R x’
I am smiling stupidly. It’s a long time since I can remember smiling at a text from Robbie. Although, ‘can you get more shaving foam, please?’ doesn’t really give you the warm and fuzzies, does it? Although, thinking about it seriously, I can’t remember a smile-inducing text exchange at all.
‘Isn’t it the first thing a girl does when she’s dumped, you know, go for the new-me look? Not that I really know. I’ve never split up with anybody before. R x’
Obviously that’s one upside of staying with the same guy – no unexpected expenses. Downside is you turn into a stay-at-home frump.
‘Oh yeah, so I’ve heard. I mean, I tend to go out and buy a new T-shirt when I’ve split with somebody. N x’
‘You must have a helluva lot of T-shirts.’
I add a crying with laughter face and grin.
‘What can I say? I like T-shirts, you can never have too many! N x’
Tuesday
‘Meet me for lunch in half an hour, across from your place? N x’
Strangely I have missed Noah despite the texts (not that I’d inflate his ego further by telling him) and am stupidly pleased at the prospect of seeing him again. Winky emoticons are not the same as seeing the real thing: the way his eyes wrinkle at the corners, the laughter that dances in