Lauren, then we are in Christ, and retribution can be mine, too.”
“That’s not what that meant.”
“Religious scripture is interpreted differently all over this crazy world. If any of us had the whole story, there wouldn’t be wars about it, murders, suicides. You don’t know if that isn’t what was meant. You’re taking a stab at it in the dark like everyone else. Anyway, enough of the religious talk. It never goes anywhere. I’m all about action. I tell ’em I’m after their ass, and then I do it.”
“Hey, look. There’s Ponce De Leon Avenue… Let’s go down that way.” She pointed up ahead, quickly changing the topic, refusing to even go there. “There are some nice parks there.”
“Yeah, I remember. It’s so peaceful here. You could almost fall asleep standing up.” They strolled at a nice pace, admiring some of the architecture as they went. “Here’s Parkwood Park. This is a pretty new one compared to some of the other parks here.”
“How’d you know that?”
“I researched, remember?” He shot her a glimpse. “Told you I wanted to look into the area before we drove over here. “I’m not afraid to die.” She stopped in her tracks, and so did he. Looking straight ahead, the man narrowed his eyes as though he’d spotted someone he knew in the distance, but there was no one there – just beautiful trees and the world around them. He searched around them. “I’m not afraid to die, Lauren…” he repeated. “It has never scared me.” He slowly turned in her direction. “Does that sound crazy to you?”
She shook her head.
“No. Death doesn’t scare everyone. In our culture, we find it scary it seems, but some cultures don’t find it scary at all.”
“What about you?”
Her afternoon green tea sat heavily in her stomach.
“Sometimes.”
“I love life.” He offered a sad smile. “But I’m not afraid to die for fear I’ll go to hell, or that it’ll hurt… nothin’ like that. See, there’s a difference between being afraid and not wanting something. I don’t want to die, because I feel like I’m the only stable influence Aiden has. I don’t want to die because I like looking up into the sky, feeling the breeze on my face when I step out my front door. I like seeing the leaves change colors in the fall and I like hearin’ the sound of my son’s laughter. I want to live because there’s nothing like the joy of riding a chopper down a winding, less travelled road…
“I like to know that I can feel pain because that means I’m alive. The addictive agony of being tattooed, struggling through an illness, or stepping on a rusty nail, enduring a terribly realistic nightmare… some crazed lunatic with an axe chasing you around in the dark forest. There’s nothing better than the gratification of a cold beer runnin’ down my throat. But the best part of being alive? That feeling you get right before you climax. I like knowing that I can feel the pleasure of a soft, warm, feminine body against me as we roll around in bed… a pair of gorgeous legs wrapped tight around me, tangled together like silky ropes.”
She swallowed as his eyes fixed on her. “The moans, sweat and lust while pushin’ deep inside of a beautiful woman… Listening to her heartbeat against my chest after I make her orgasm so good, she falls asleep, and I lie there smelling her hair, her body, traces of her sensual elation left against my skin and perfuming the air. That’s life. That’s living.”
Her muscles tightened, twitching beneath the surface. “Those are the reasons why I don’t want to die, Lauren, and I’d say they are damn good reasons… but I’m not afraid. I wonder if Benjamin was afraid to die, Lauren?” His eyes darkened then lit up, as if he were struggling with his words and the workings of his own, complicated mind.
Now, it came full circle. The unanswered questions lived on within him like the breath of the ancestors within the lungs. He couldn’t shake them off.
“If he loved life, he may have been, Aries. Or he may have been like you.” He took her other hand, and they stood there, regarding one another. Aries blocked part of the sun. The moon swam in his eyes and the oceans, rivers and lakes, too. He was a fast fire, spreading like streaks of light. And yet, he controlled the heat so the ones he loved most were protected from his blaze.
“Thank