making sure I got the ones with my mom. The photos were all I had left of her.
I could remember her smile and the way she smelled, but she had died when I was four. I put the picture of her holding me, the both of us smiling for the camera in my pocket. I wondered if she was looking out for me, or just watching me and wondering what I was doing with my life. I found myself wishing she were there with me, helping me pack and keeping me from getting scared.
I grabbed some things for my dad, and of course the binder full of important legal papers. It all fit in the bag and I put it by the front door. I picked up a plastic grocery bag and filled it with dog food before double bagging it. That and Shadow's leash went by the door too.
The sky seemed darker outside, so I checked the home phone again, feeling a little silly. I still had this horrible nagging sensation that something wasn't right. I paced the house a couple of times, making sure that I had all the sentimental stuff from the walls as well as all the practical things. My pile by the door grew a little, but not much. I couldn't shake the edgy feeling. Smoke and flames flashed on the silent TV screen.
I picked up my cell phone, thinking I would call Britney or someone from work to come get me. There was a missed call and a text message. Both were from Andrew. I felt my heart quicken and I nearly dropped the phone, my fingers clumsily pressing the buttons to view the message.
Where are you?
I looked at the message confused. It wasn't at all what I was expecting.
Home. Can we talk? I hit send and waited for the return message. It came almost immediately.
Bing. Why aren't you evacuated? Why aren't you here?
I felt a cold sweat break out on my forehead, my back twitching. The phone started vibrating in my hands and I answered it. "Hello?"
"Holly? Why aren't you at the evacuation site? Are you alright?" Andrew sounded worried. I felt a strange comfort in just hearing his voice.
"I haven't gotten a call yet- I didn't think it was that close," I answered. There was so much else I wanted to say to him, but the worry in his voice made me wait.
"Holly, you have to get out of there- they are saying that whole mountain is about to go up once the wind shifts. You have get out of there now, Holly!" Andrew's voice was practically shaking. Or maybe that was just my hand. I glanced out the window at the growing smoke, suddenly feeling very afraid.
"Andrew, I don't have a car. I don't have a way to get out," my voice sounded strange in my ears. Distant, like it wasn't me talking anymore.
"Holly, I can't hear you.. yo..breaki...p...." Andrew's voice crackled in my ear.
"Andrew? Andrew!" I cried into the phone, but the line was only static. Fear pulsated through my body, my hands shaking as I put my phone in my pocket next to my mom. I swallowed hard and opened the front door. The smoke was thicker than when I had looked out at it earlier, and I threw my stuff out on the front porch.
I could see the road was still clear, and it was my only way down the mountain. I could walk that with Shadow and still carry the duffel bag. I imagined walking into the evacuation site and it suddenly becoming an entertaining story. I tried not to think about the part where I wasn't sure where the evacuation site was or that the closest house was half a mile away.
I picked up Shadow's leash and went to the back door. I stepped out on the porch, the smoke making me sneeze. I called to her, but I couldn't see her. She usually stayed close to the house, the electric fence keeping her penned in.
Out of the corner of my eye I saw the TV screen was dark. I hadn't turned it off. My stomach was creeping up my throat, and I battled to keep it down and to stay calm. I could handle this. The power was out, but I was leaving anyway. I swallowed on a dry mouth and stepped out on to the back porch. If the power was out then that meant the fence was down. Shadow couldn't have gotten far.
I