it to her daughter to mother her in the best way she could? And didn’t that mean operating under all possible information? Didn’t it mean doing whatever it took to make sure she had all relevant details of Haddie’s genetic makeup? God, she wished she’d made that part of the original deal. She’d still sign on the dotted line, but she would have insisted on a file of Royce’s medical records.
Maybe though . . . maybe there was still a chance she could get them.
If she changed her mind . . . well, she had renovation shopping she could do in LA too.
She tilted the mirror so she could see Haddie better. “Hey, how do you feel about a visit to Gram this weekend?”
Haddie’s smile was bright and instantaneous. And that settled that.
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
Thirteen Years Ago
The girls filed in, their hands steepled together in front of them in prayer, heads bowed. The air was drenched in the scent of frankincense and myrrh, a smell that Kandace knew would forevermore bring to mind fear and the desperation to be free.
She followed Sydney as she turned at their assigned pew, shuffling sideways, and then going down on her knees on the red velvet prayer bench.
The lights were dimmed, candlelight sparkling from the altar as Ms. Carroll played the piano softly from the left front of the room, a piece of worship music that sounded melancholy and full of foreshadow.
Ms. Wykes stepped to the front of the church, clasping her hands in front of her, her gaze traveling over the two pews where they sat. “Good evening, girls,” she said, her lips curving upward in a smile Kandace could only describe as wicked. “As you know, the Religious Guild will be joining us for service tonight and you will be enjoying refreshments afterward. These men are pious, upstanding, and very important members of our community and we are blessed by their presence.” She looked pointedly around. “As always, I have no doubt you will give them the reverence and respect they deserve.”
Kandace’s nerves felt raw.
These men had come once before when she’d first arrived at Lilith House. She turned along with the other girls as the doors to the chapel opened again and eight men walked in, single file, just like the first time. Each was wearing an identical white suit, and each looked fastidiously groomed. All of them looked ancient, easily over the age of forty.
Her gaze moved over them. She thought these men were different than the first group that’d joined them for a service. She hadn’t paid much attention to those men then. She’d all but rolled her eyes and turned her thoughts away. She hadn’t considered who they were or why they were there. Of course, Kandace had been different then. Then, she had practically laughed at their ridiculous ceremony and thought what weird, religious fools they were. She hadn’t thought to look at them with suspicion. She hadn’t thought to wonder what her role in the ceremony was.
Kandace was inquisitive by nature, and her life thus far had ensured she was plenty cynical, but this? This was completely out of her purview. She had to believe that was the case for every girl there. Maybe it was why they were more easily influenced, their learned behavior more . . . pliable. Lilith House left them all flailing for something that seemed halfway solid to grasp on to. Rules. Obedience. It was what Lilith House offered. And if you accepted, you felt at least halfway in control of your own fate.
The nervous fluttering quickened in Kandace’s belly. Yes, this was . . . odd. And unnerving. Why did a group of old men want to join a religious service at a girl’s school a good distance outside town?
“Why do they come here?” she whispered under her breath.
She didn’t realize she’d said it loud enough for Sydney to hear, until her roommate whispered back. “Who knows. They’re stuffy, but fine.” She itched her neck and hazarded a quick glance behind her. “And them being here means we get dessert.”
Ah, yes. There was that. The girls of Lilith House were denied sugar. Except when the men of the Religious Guild paid them a visit. They’d go back to the dining room where trays of decadent sweets would be passed around, the girls allowed to partake in one of the only pleasures they were briefly permitted.
As the service began, and they all bowed their heads in prayer, Kandace took the opportunity to