nodded, sighed. “It’s true. It can be really hard not having someone to split the workload with.” She chewed on her lip for a moment as if considering. “In lots of ways, things are easier now that Haddie isn’t a baby. No diapers, no crazy sleep schedule.” She paused for a moment. “But Haddie . . . well, you haven’t met her, but she’s . . . she’s different.” She frowned slightly as though regretting her own words.
“How do you mean?”
“Well, my friend Merrilee calls her an old soul, and I guess that’s a good way to describe it. She’s the most serious kid you’ll ever meet. It’s like she has this very intense inner world that so far, she hasn’t shared with me.”
Cam tilted his head. He could relate to that. For different reasons of course. He’d been isolated from the world at large, his early existence mostly narrowed down to three basement rooms. He’d been deeply shamed by the fact that he—they—were considered such an embarrassment that they had to be hidden away like a dirty secret. Then later, tricked, used . . . Yes, that was all different, but even now, he had trouble sharing his inner feelings with anyone. Sometimes he wanted to, he did, but he simply didn’t know how. Nor had there been anyone he could tell, because his thoughts and experiences seemed too unusual, too strange and overwhelming to hand over to another person and expect them to even remotely understand. To handle them gently. Except for the people who’d lived it with him. Those who were also discarded . . . “Maybe she just doesn’t have the words yet to describe all her feelings,” he offered.
She nodded. “Yes. Yes, that’s what I’ve thought too. Hoped. It’s just . . . in the meantime, I worry about her. I worry that she keeps secrets from me.”
“What sort of secrets?”
Scarlett shrugged. “I don’t know.” Her gaze moved away again, a worried frown creasing her forehead. His fingers moved more swiftly on the blade of grass, folding and looping.
“I’m probably not one to give advice on kids”—he glanced up at her momentarily—“but what I do know is that you’re a loving mom who cares deeply for her daughter. Anyone with two eyes in their head could see that. And I don’t think there’s anything more important for a kid than that. She’ll find the words, eventually. And you’ll be the first person she brings them to.”
She smiled softly. “Thanks, Camden, I appreciate that.” She closed her eyes momentarily, breathing out a small sigh. “This is a good place to bring your troubles to. Do you feel that way as well?”
He nodded. “Yes. The peace of this place feels bigger than anything else.”
“Yes, that’s exactly it. I’ve been sitting here thinking about the natives you told me about, the ones who were so brutalized by Hubert Bancroft. You said there are legends about horned devils in these woods seeking revenge.” She shook her head. “But I only feel peace here, the way they must have once upon a time. It’s like it . . . lingers in some supernatural way. I think maybe it’s their gift and their legacy. Not vengeance, or hatred. Just peace.”
He watched his fingers working the grass for a moment. “I like the thought,” he said. “But after what was done to them, who could blame them for wanting vengeance? In one life or another. Don’t they deserve it?”
She tilted her head, her eyes moving over his features as though she’d heard something in his voice he hadn’t meant for her to hear. “I heard this story once about an old Cherokee. He said to his grandson, ‘There is a battle between two wolves inside us all. One wolf is evil and angry. Jealous and resentful. The other wolf is good. It is filled with love and hope, humility and empathy.’” She paused and he leaned toward her unbidden. “The little boy thought about it and asked, ‘Grandpa, which wolf wins?’ And the old man quietly replied, ‘The one you feed.’”
Camden felt an odd rush of breeze move through him as though a door somewhere deep inside had just been opened. The wolf you feed is the one who wins. But was it possible to stop feeding one wolf to feed the other? And was it too late for him? He let out a slow breath. “I like that. I’ll remember it.”
She smiled. “I’ve talked a whole lot about myself. Tell me