can do that.”
“My grandmother used those leaves for a lot of things. To cure people, to help them, and to make me forget.” I shook my head. “Why do I remember everything else? I didn’t even remember he disappeared that same night.”
“We believe what we want to believe.” River went back to his book.
“Are you human?” I tried to keep my voice level, but the question was quiet. Maybe I didn’t want to know.
“I am.” The edge of his mouth lifted.
“But are you not—“
“The Devil?” He glanced at me over the book. “I don’t know. Are you not a witch?”
“I’m not.”
“You come from a long family of witches. Many of whom were burned at the stake.”
“For having strong opinions about things.”
“For practicing witchcraft, Penelope. Even you can’t kid yourself into thinking they weren’t. Your grandmother is one of the island’s most sought-out healers.” He raised an eyebrow.
“Healer doesn’t mean witch.”
“Outcast doesn’t mean Devil.”
I leaned back against the headboard and stared at him. His gaze flicked from me back to his book, which was apparently more interesting. I crossed my arms. I was fully intending to say something snappy, but my mind drifted back to the memory.
“My father didn’t believe me,” I said after a long moment. River lowered the book and looked at me, but didn’t say anything. He just waited. “He didn’t believe me about my cousin when I told him. He said he wouldn’t bother Esteban because of everything he’d been through and then kicked me to the curb like I was Thursday’s trash.” I brought my knees up to my chest and hugged myself.
“I’m so angry. And sad. But mostly, angry. For years I wanted my father to call me, to forgive me for the picture I didn’t remember taking. To be proud of me for everything I’d accomplished and . . . ” I shook my head and swallowed again. “For what? He didn’t even side with his own daughter.”
“He didn’t know how.”
I glanced up and met River’s gaze again. The room was dark, but I could swear I saw the compassion in his eyes.
“Sometimes men don’t know how to deal with the mistakes of another, so they ignore them instead.” He shut his book and set it down, sitting back in the daybed and stretching his long legs out. “We make excuses for ourselves in hopes for our salvation. We ignore others’ wrongdoings so that we don’t have to look too closely at our own. It’s the way we survive.”
“That doesn’t make what he did okay.”
“It doesn’t.”
“It doesn’t make what you did okay.”
“I’ve learned to live with my sins, little witch. I don’t need your judgment, or your penance.”
“I’m not a witch.” I felt myself scowl.
River looked like he wanted to smile, but didn’t.
I yawned loudly. “I can’t believe I’d actually go to sleep after all of that.”
“Sleep.” He stood up and walked over to one of the gas lamps, switching it off. He was wearing khaki pants and a white button-down and didn’t look ready for bed at all.
“Will you . . . ” I bit my lip. “Are you going to stay?”
“Do you want me to?” He paused by the fireplace. “After everything?”
I nodded. I didn’t know why. It didn’t make sense. I should be angry with him. I should never want to see his face again. And yet . . . I sighed. River turned around and clicked another lamp off before walking over to the bed and sliding under the covers. I lowered my legs and scooted farther down in bed until my head was on the pillow.
“I had a dream about you.” I licked my lips.
“A good dream?”
“I’m not sure.”
“Hm.”
I turned in bed, facing him, even though now the room was pitch black and there was no chance of me seeing him at all. “Do you dream?”
“Everyone dreams.”
“Do you have good dreams?”
“Only when you’re in them.” I could hear the smile in his voice when he said it, so I knew he was making a joke. My face went hot anyway. God. If he only knew the dream he’d starred in. “Good night, little witch. I hope you dream about me again tonight.”
I opened my eyes to the sound of murmuring voices nearby and turned to see that River was no longer beside me. When I sat up, I followed the sound of the voices to the door, which was slightly parted. River wasn’t there though, but I could make out a dog standing there. A large dog. A wolf.