breath. “It’s not like I really blame her, given how Dad was. You know she was only sixteen when Kevin was born? Twenty for me. I think the marriage was pack arranged too. I doubt she ever loved Dad. Who wouldn’t want to escape that? Get away from his cold power.”
“Will Kev be okay with the contract if you are?” asked Isaac, even though it was clear Colin wasn’t okay with any of this. But if Col wanted to put a brave face on everything, Isaac seemed disposed to let him.
Judd sighed. He would have pushed the matter. But Isaac was an Omega. He supposed Omegas knew best.
Colin shrugged. “I don’t know.”
“You gotta learn to talk about this shit with your brother,” Judd said, unable to help himself. Kevin had probably kept Lexi’s identity from the pack because he didn’t know how his younger brother would feel. And now Colin didn’t know how his older brother felt. They should fucking communicate.
Colin gave a sad lopsided smile. “Family code. Don’t talk about shit that hurts. You’re old, you should know that one.”
Judd snorted. “I’m so old I know better, kid.”
There was a moment of quiet. Everyone stilled. Judd wanted Isaac to leave so he could sit on Colin’s bed, gather him into his arms. Not so much for Colin’s comfort as for his own. But he was afraid Colin would flinch away. That would break Judd’s heart even more. Plus, what right did he have to offer comfort?
Eventually Isaac spoke, absentmindedly and softly, as if he were reminding himself of something. “You know, they’re supposed to take care of us. Parents are supposed to look after us, and love us, and talk and hug and all that sappy stupid stuff. You know that, right?”
“Yeah.” Colin stared back down at the floor. He looked fragile, sunken in on himself.
Isaac’s voice firmed. “No, I mean, do you know it – all the way down to your bones? The ones that break and reform. Really know it. I don’t think we heal, without that knowledge. You get to blame him. And her. You get to hate them even. I give you permission, if you need it.”
Colin didn’t say anything. He was probably afraid of breaking down. Judd suppressed his own need to cry.
Isaac nodded. Point made. His Omega timing clearly telling him not to push. Judd envied him that.
Isaac stood gracefully and left the room. He nudged Judd further into it as he left. A weird kind of permission. He shut the door and Judd was alone with Colin. Together.
Yet Judd was at a loss. What should he do? He usually knew what to do. Maybe not what to say, but action. He was good at action. Now, he was at a loss. He hadn’t a life experience to share. He didn’t know how to reach Colin and provide comfort. Even if he did, Judd wasn’t the right person to do so. Judd represented everything that repelled Colin – big, fierce, older, enforcer. Just like good old Dad. He didn’t want to loom. He didn’t want to scare Colin. God, anything not to scare him.
The silence stretched out between them, unraveling all Judd’s dumb longing.
Finally Colin’s voice trembled out, small and barely audible. “Forgive me for snapping earlier? You didn’t know.”
“Done.” Judd figured that if he didn’t know what to do, the best thing was to ask. Colin might be young, but he seemed to know his own mind. “How can I help make this easier for you?”
He meant them having to work for Colin’s mother. He meant dredging up lost family and old wounds. He wanted to be given a task, something that would make everything better.
“What do you need?” Judd asked. Tense. Ready to leave. Ready to be rejected. Ready to not fight, when fighting was all he was good for.
“Would you? Maybe…” Colin hesitated.
“Anything,” Judd said, probably injudiciously. But Colin so rarely asked for anything. Judd was sure whatever he wanted, Alec would accommodate.
“Maybe a hug?” Voice so tentative, as if Colin shocked himself with the request.
Judd had never felt more surprised in his life. He’d also never moved so quickly across a bedroom. And that was saying something.
Colin had no idea what possessed him to ask for such a thing. A hug! Really? As if I’m the kid Judd always calls me.
He’d spent his whole life training his needy body not to desire touch. He’d thought for so long that he wasn’t going to be a werewolf, that he’d better