It was hard—but her parents were even richer than mine, and we had more help than most. Still, it aged me… in the best way. I wasn’t ready to move on from parenting when Corinne finally left the house. I’m sure your parents feel the same way.”
Julian felt his stomach twist and he cleared his throat as he leaned back against the rough wood. “They were nearly your age when I was born. My mother didn’t know she was pregnant for a while. Um. But they died when I was pretty young.”
Fredric’s expression fell into something like sorrow. “I’m so sorry.”
“It’s fine. They didn’t want me,” he said, and when Fredric looked worse, he reached over and put a hand on his arm. “I promise it’s fine. My brother was already in his twenties when I was born. He was better at raising me than they were, so when I went to live with him, it was where I wanted to go in the first place. I mean, it was an adjustment, but I’m not suffering.”
“I just can’t imagine,” Fredric said, then shook his head with a sigh. “I try not to judge other people, but it’s difficult some days.”
“Yeah,” Archer replied, and he was speaking directly about this wedding.
“This wasn’t easy for me. I…this is my last hurrah with this family,” Fredric said. “I know I shouldn’t be dumping this on you. You and Julian are brand new and the illusion of the honeymoon is still fresh.”
Cocking his head to the side, Archer studied the man. He looked tired, but not that old. His hair was greying, but there was still rich black underneath, and he was good looking. He had something about him that radiated power and passion, and it was hard to imagine him settling for misery. “Do you really think it’s an illusion?”
“Maybe not all the time,” Fredric answered from behind a sigh, “but often. Have you been in love before, Will?”
Archer found it suddenly unbearable that he was going to care for some of these people, and hate others—and they would never say his real name. “I haven’t.”
He let himself think about Finch for a minute, about how he’d had hand-holding, kissing under the bleachers relationships in high school, but no one had ever taken time with him the way Finch did that afternoon. And then Finch had kissed him, and laughed at him, and told him he was worth no more than his silence.
He kept it simple after that—quick nights at the discotheque, a quick fuck in a pay toilet in London hoping they were sober enough to slip in and out without being watched. He never brought anyone home, and he never said hello or goodbye. And it was fine—and maybe it added a little bit of credibility to his lie with Julian because although he wasn’t paid for it, no one had ever meant anything to him.
“I’ve been married to my research for a while now.” It felt good to offer scraps of the truth to Fredric who didn’t deserve lies.
“But my son changed that?”
Archer dragged a hand down his face, then he smiled because there was no hidden agenda in what he could offer this man. “Julian is special. He doesn’t deserve the shit he puts himself through, and he’s absolutely worth my time.”
Fredric let out a sigh and reached down to pet his dog who leaned into it. “I’ve been waiting a long time to hear someone say that. And I’m no fool, son. I know that it’s unlikely it’ll be forever. But I hope whatever you have stays good.”
“I think it will,” Archer told him, and he meant it. Five days left. Five days of offering bits and pieces of support and happiness, and then Julian would go on with his life and hopefully never, ever look back on this again. And when he did—in those darker moments when there was no defense against the things that still hurt—maybe he’d remember Archer first.
Chapter 12
Dinner was a sit-down, pre-fixe event in the same little banquet hall, and Archer endured most of it by biting his tongue as he finally got a good look at Julian’s ex. He was attractive from afar. He was younger than Julian by a few years, and he had no doubt it was Botox, nips, and tucks that kept his forehead pristine and motionless. He had full lips, dark blonde hair, and blue eyes that were small and watery.
He spoke with a grin, but there was