this possible? How could I share such a powerful connection with so many men at once?
But it was the realest thing I’d ever felt.
Ever.
Without a doubt, I knew what Kai suspected was true. We—my guardians and I—were meant to be bonded, but I could admit to not really understanding what that meant. For me.
For my future.
I didn’t come here to find love or … whatever this was. The only thing I currently knew for sure was that I never wanted this feeling to end. If I could have it my way, I would get to relive it over and over again, maybe even … forever?
This was not supposed to happen.
Or, according to Spirit … this had been the plan all along.
Chapter Twenty-One
Noelle
“Uh … Earth to Noelle.”
I peered up from yet another daydream when Toni said my name. She made it her personal mission to keep my mind off things tonight, to keep my mind off what would happen at midnight. However, it’d been hard to focus on anything but the guys since our little rendezvous on the roof. Not even my fast encroaching birthday had stolen my focus. Every few minutes, it was like I could still feel their arms wrapped around my body, feel their soft lips against mine.
They’d been a huge distraction, and apparently Toni was starting to notice my weirdness.
“Girl, what has gotten into you today?” she grinned when asking.
I wasn’t really sure how to answer that without telling her the whole truth. A truth I wasn’t sure she’d understand.
When her brow quirked, it was clear I’d have to say something.
“I um—”
“Quit stalling and just tell me his name,” she said with a laugh. “Oh, wait! Did something happen with Tristan finally?”
My smile faded a bit, which was completely an accident. It’s just that I didn’t like him like that.
“No, not Tristan,” I answered.
“But someone,” she deduced.
There was a brief moment where I hesitated to out myself, but then decided to tell her.
Slowly.
“I may have … kissed Kai,” I admitted, which sent Toni into some sort of screaming, spasmic fit. A laugh slipped as I watched her fall out on the end of my bed where she sat.
“Dude! Are you being for real?” she squealed. “You made out with your mentor?”
It sounded so, so dirty when she said it like that.
“They’re not as old as the others,” I argued, trying to hold in my laugh. “Don’t make this any weirder than it already is.”
Her eyes stretched wide. “Weird? It’s actually pretty freakin’ hot. Heck, I’d take any one of them,” she admitted, staring at me with admiration. “You might just be my shero now.”
I shoved her and she laughed again.
“There’s actually more,” I confessed. “A lot more.”
She settled in and hugged her pillow. “Girl, tell me everything. Did y’all … you know?” she asked, dancing with her shoulders
Just the thought of what she suggested made my temperature rise.
“No,” I said somewhat regretfully, “but … it wasn’t just Kai.”
If I were a kid, this would’ve been the part where I hid behind my hands, peeking through my fingers.
Toni’s head cocked to the side. “What do you mean?”
There was no delicate way to put this. “I mean, I didn’t just kiss Kai. I mean, I kissed Rayen and Paulo, too.”
Clearly unsure if she heard me right, Toni’s expression was completely blank.
“I know it all sounds strange, but … things just got really complicated,” was the conclusion I reached.
Still not saying a word, Toni stood from my bed and my heart raced, thinking she’d walk away, leaving things on this awkward note. However, when she faced me, and then knelt to the floor and bowed repeatedly, I burst out laughing.
“I know most think you’re just a princess, but if all this is true, you’re the queen in my eyes,” she gushed, making me laugh even harder. “All three?” she asked incredulously as she got back onto the bed. “Well, where was Ori? Did he think he was too good to get in on the action?”
“It wasn’t like it happened all at once,” I explained. “First, it was Kai. Then Rayen and Paulo this morning. But as far as Ori goes, we’re barely cordial, so let’s not push it.”
Toni shrugged. “Well, three out of four ain’t bad.”
This girl …
I felt her eyes on me long before turning to face her. “So … what now? Seeing as how the Chief nixed your plan to leave, are you going to pick one or something?”
The side of my lip ached when I gnawed it.