words. How Darryl didn’t spend much time with me. He’d been scarce since Boxing Day—the day after Christmas.
“That’s fine. I suck at cards.” I’d not played since college. Martin and I used to until the kids came along.
“Meet you at the Pink Lace Don’t Tell store at the mall in thirty minutes?”
“Sure.” I hung up and sighed.
I needed to not let everything be so personal with me. Needed to stop second-guessing motives and perceiving slights that didn’t exist.
Maybe Darryl and I could have our own couple thing, like bowling night, or we could train Herbie to do dog shows. The thought of that ginormous, gangly dog wearing a bow and prancing around was enough to make me smile as I headed out.
Maybe I’d pop by Darryl’s place on the way back just to say hi.
It took me just under thirty minutes to arrive at the mall, meaning I was already browsing when Trish joined me. My cheeks felt hot. It was too hot. I think I was having a hot flash in the store.
“Please don’t tell me you’re going to wear black. The popping of your widow cherry deserves something joyous for the occasion,” Trish declared as she waded the racks of provocative underwear.
“I’m not a virgin,” I reminded her, sifting quickly past the scrap of fabric with the hole in the butt. I planned to start with the basics, which meant front and back covered.
“You were with one man for more than twenty years. One. Man,” Trish said with a shudder.
“And? You telling me you’re not planning to be with Marjorie forever?”
“Yes. But the plan is to build a stable of dildos, one for each letter of the alphabet to make sure we keep changing things up.”
I had nothing to say. Literally nothing. I had a purple pocket rocket bought at the pharmacy because hey, if they sold it, it must be healthy for me. The idea of a stable… It had merit.
“Don’t look at me like that,” Trish exclaimed. “I’ll have you know a properly made phallus will never disappoint. Even without batteries they can still do the job.”
“But they can’t hug you after. Or share popcorn while watching a scary movie.”
“Good point, which is why it is time for you to lustily go after what you want.”
She was talking about me and Darryl. “Why do you think I’m here?” I fingered a pair of pink satin panties with a bold pattern of flowers.
“I’m surprised you haven’t taken him for a test run yet.”
“We’re taking things slow. Waiting for the right time.”
“The sooner you pop that hesitant cherry, the better. You’ll feel better.”
“I feel fine.” If slightly nauseous.
“You’ll feel finer after.”
I laughed. “That isn’t even a word.” But I understood the sentiment.
“Try these on.” Trish plucked several garments and handed them to me. Most were not the type I would have dared contemplate.
“You need me to help you get into them?” Trish asked with an exaggerated wink.
“And have your girlfriend kill me?” I shook my head. Not to mention, no one had seen my body in a long time, unless my family doctor counted.
The inside of the dressing room was spacious enough to spread out. I removed my purse and clothes and left them folded on the bench. I did my best to avoid looking in the mirror. I’d kept my underpants on because I wasn’t putting on any bottoms without anything there, but my breasts hung heavily. I hated them but stuffed them into a bra and straightened.
I usually stuck to sports bras. Easy to stow and forget the boobs, but the contraption I wore—made of stiff fabric and wire—did something to my breasts. Lifted them and shaped them into something that made smile.
I’d had nice boobs in my twenties. This bra took twenty years off my current set. It made me wonder if I should make an appointment and talk to a plastic surgeon. Research showed lots of women my age opting for some work. I could certainly use it on my stomach.
My cotton undies went up to the waist and covered the loose skin bulge. I slid some panties over mine, the crinkle of the paper in the crotch making me think of a pad. They sat bikini style on my hips. The sideways profile had me tearing them off quick. Nope. All the tinier scraps ended up being a no. But I did like the boy shorts in lace, tight enough to hold everything in, and a hole on the bottom for access. Which