the ocean.
This was as close as I got, and it would have to do.
There was just something about water that brought me peace, made me feel calm and relaxed.
I walked down towards a large tree that had fallen over the creek.
It had been there for a while. When we were kids, all of us would walk across it on a dare.
One time, I had come so close to freaking out and falling. That day, it had been David, Aaron, and me. Ben, Drake, and Cade had just left to go back home.
It had been too late for me to turn back. So I stood there, wobbling and yelling out. My brother had been laughing, but Aaron must have sensed how scared I actually was of falling.
The creek wasn’t deep, but I was afraid of landing on the rocks below and hurting myself.
He had talked to me and helped me focus on putting one foot in front of the other until he was able to grab my hand and help me off the tree.
I could still kind of remember the feel of his hand holding mine. Even back then, he’d been strong and kind.
Now, several years later, walking across the fallen tree didn’t faze me at all. I hopped on and walked halfway across easily.
I sat down on the exact spot I had stopped so long ago, frozen completely with fear.
I sat and watched the water run past me just a couple of feet below.
After a minute, I closed my eyes and just focused on the sound of the water.
It was like meditation.
Something about the water…
One day, I had to see the ocean, I decided.
Maybe even live near it.
Feel the sand below my feet every morning, wake up to the sound of waves crashing on the shore.
Fall asleep to the same sound.
I couldn’t imagine anything better.
The sound of a twig breaking in two had me opening my eyes.
Right away, my heart began racing, and I glanced around for the source of the sound.
Were Mom and David looking for me? Why hadn’t they just texted? Why weren’t they saying anything?
Unless it was someone else.
Then movement caught my eye. Aaron came into view. “Oh. Hey. Did I scare you?” he asked.
My heart was still racing. “Um, no. I’m fine.” I stayed sitting where I was. He came closer. “I didn’t know you came here.”
He shrugged. “I don’t. Usually.” He paused, looking down at the water, hands in his pockets. “But I just had to get out of my house. Drake is in a mood, and Eli is being…Eli. Kinda hard to be alone in a house full of people.”
“Oh,” I replied. “I know the feeling.”
Aaron glanced away.
Was it me or was something off about him?
I got up with ease and moved towards solid ground, extending my arms out for balance. I hopped off the tree and walked up to him. “You okay?”
He nodded but still didn’t look at me. “Yeah. I’m good.”
But I knew him better than that. I grabbed a hold of his chin and turned his face toward me. I studied his face. Yep, something was wrong. “No, you’re not.”
He shrugged it off and went back to staring at the water. “It’s fine.”
“What’s fine?” I asked.
When he didn’t say anything, I tried to think of what it could be.
I remembered how happy he’d looked talking to that cheerleader. Had something happened? “It wouldn’t have to do with a certain girl you were talking to, would it?” I prodded.
He turned to me, looking puzzled. “What certain girl?”
Uh oh. So that wasn’t it.
“Rachel?” he insisted. “What girl?”
I glanced around at the trees, the sky, whatever, trying to figure out a way to get out of this. Now it was my turn to shrug. “You know,” I said, as nonchalantly as possible. “That girl…”
He still looked as confused as ever.
“From the game?” I added.
Now he knew what I was talking about. “Oh. You saw that?” he asked.
“I did,” I said, making sure my tone of voice was even. “Did she not text you back or something? Is that what’s going on?”
He chuckled.
I turned to him, glanced him up and down. Why was he chuckling?
“Is that why you’ve been extra weird the past few days?” he asked. “Because you think I’m into that girl from the game?”
“I don’t think anything,” I replied, a little defensive. I struggled to sound neutral. “I was just wondering if that’s why you were upset. You seemed like you were into her.”
He stared at me.
“Nothing wrong with that,” I said,