with Maddie’s annoyance with me and my annoyance with the situation, I’ll also have to confront my boss, who is most likely pretty pissed off at me. I’ve kept my phone off on purpose. I’m not checking my emails. Whatever is waiting for me at work can wait until tomorrow.
On Saturday afternoon, we stand in line at BookPeople, waiting to checkout. Maddie has a stack of six books pinned under her arm. Still, she’s not satisfied. She’s perusing the shelves near the counter, reading the synopsis on the back of yet another book.
“Oooh, I’ve been meaning to read this!” she says before trying to add it to her stack. I laugh and take it from her, adding it to my pile instead.
“I’m going to pay for that,” she says, giving me a shrewd stare.
“Uh-huh.”
At the counter, I tell the clerk to ring up all the books on one order.
“Aiden! You don’t have to buy my books! This is an equal opportunity partnership.”
I wink and tell her she can buy my lunch.
We walk over to Whole Foods across the street, heading up to the rooftop deck once we’ve grabbed our food.
“Bet you can’t eat outside like this in New York right now,” she says, leaning back in her chair and tipping her head up to face the sun.
She’s right. In February, it’s still jacket and beanie weather in New York. In Austin, people are already in tank tops and flip-flops. I stare at Maddie as she keeps her head tilted to the sky. I take in her delicate profile, the lone freckle just above her left eyebrow, the bit of pizza sauce she doesn’t realize is on the corner of her mouth.
The thought of leaving her tomorrow completely steals my appetite.
It’s the elephant in the room we aren’t talking about. Saturday bleeds into Sunday too quickly. Minutes pass even as I try to slow them down. My flight is in the early evening, and I pack my suitcase as Maddie sits on the edge of her bed, watching me.
“Don’t forget your watch,” she says, pointing to where it sits on her nightstand. I pick it up and wrap it around my wrist.
“And your toothbrush is still in the bathroom, I think.”
“I’ll get it in a second.”
“Do you want me to make you some snacks for the plane?” She stands before I can reply. “I’ll just get you an apple and some chips or something. That way you’re not hungry. I hate those flights that coincide with dinnertime. I’m always starving by the time I land.”
“Maddie—”
“I could make you a little sandwich too, if you want. I know they’ll have food at the airport, so it’s your call.” Without taking a breath, she continues, “Why don’t I just make you one and then you can decide later?”
I reach out to block her before she can leave the room. She’s been like this for the last few hours, a whirling dervish.
“Maddie, pause.”
Her eyes go round with shock.
“Don’t you want a sandwich?”
I can’t help but smile a little.
“I’m all set on the sandwiches, thanks.”
“What about an apple?”
“You’re avoiding what’s about to happen.”
Her jaw drops in shock. “No I’m not!”
“I’m leaving again.”
She thunks me on the forehead. “Duh. You’re going to the airport.”
“Yes, and I’m going to New York and then I’m likely flying to London for at least two weeks to cover a UN conference.”
“London,” she says, monotone.
“London.”
“That’s…far away.”
“Exactly.”
Her face crumbles. The veneer she’s worn all day—the happy-go-lucky, rainbows-and-butterflies girl—is gone. Her eyebrows pinch together as she shakes her head.
“I don’t want to start this all over again, more weeks without you. It’s too hard.”
“I know.”
“When will you be back in the States for good?”
I shake my head, and she tugs her arm out of my hold. It hurts that she’s pulling away again, but I try to ignore the sting.
“It could be after London, but I need to look at my schedule. After leaving Dubai early, there’s a good chance my editor isn’t going to be happy with me. I don’t know what comes next.”
“So then we just have to wait and see?”
I nod, hating that answer.
Maddie turns away then, walking out of the room without saying a word. I watch her go into the kitchen and open the fridge. She pulls out an apple, washes it, and starts cutting it into slices. She fills up bags with snacks for me to take to the airport. She makes sure I didn’t forget any of my things, and then she walks me down to