have a vengeance against—”
“Me,” Tedros cut in, over their shoulders. “Agatha’s right! What if King Teapea knows who I am? What if he sees us as enemies? What if we came to the one ruler who wants me and my friends dead even more than Rhian?”
“Then we’re dead either way,” said Robin grimly.
“In the meantime, stand in the back,” the Sheriff grunted at Tedros.
Agatha’s stomach lurched. The gold throne in front of her suddenly loomed larger. Here they were, preoccupied with their family reunion, when they’d willingly sealed themselves in a stranger’s palace. A stranger who surely hated Tedros enough to kill him on sight. Her unease about this place exploded into panic. This was an ambush. She could feel it. They needed to get out of here now—
Before she could move, the gnome’s trumpet blared again: “Presenting the Honorable, Exorable, Crown Royal Regis . . . Teapea!”
For a moment, nothing happened.
Then Agatha saw it.
A shadow slinking from the back of the room towards the throne, slowly, smoothly, like it was floating on air.
Agatha recoiled, doom impaling her heart.
The shadow drew closer . . . closer . . .
King Teapea came into the light, revealing himself.
Sophie dropped her milk.
Tedros toppled backwards.
All eyes in the room shot to Agatha.
She couldn’t breathe.
There was no way.
No possible way.
Because the leader of the gnomes, their sole chance for survival, their only hope for help in all these Woods, just happened to be . . .
Her cat.
18
TEDROS
The Ultimate Mission
Tedros lifted his head blearily, quite sure he’d imagined the whole thing.
He hadn’t.
Reaper sat on the gilded throne, his bald, shriveled skin looking especially sickly beneath his crooked crown, his one good eye glowering at the prince, while Agatha looked stultified, her mouth agape.
Two more gnome guards wielding scimitars emerged from the darkness behind the throne and flanked the cat from both sides, while the gnome with the trumpet manned the door. On the head of the throne, the carved letters C. R. R. TEAPEA rearranged to . . .
REAPER CAT
Tedros choked.
Reaper sat on his hind legs and meowed loudly into the silence.
Princess Uma stepped forward from her place amongst the first years. “Yes, Your, um . . . Highness?”
Reaper meowed again.
Princess Uma approached the throne.
Agatha’s cat whispered to her.
Uma nodded and tapped a glowing fingertip to his throat.
“This is impossible,” said Agatha, blinking like a fool. “There has to be some mistake—”
“No mistake,” said her cat with a firm, deep voice. “You just haven’t been paying attention.”
Agatha rocked back on her heels. “You talk?”
“I find man’s language a limited and ugly one, but thanks to Uma’s spell, I can communicate for the purposes of our meeting,” said Reaper, before turning his bold yellow eyes on Tedros. “And you’re lucky I haven’t spoken before today, given you’ve kicked me, called me Satan, and thrown me in a toilet, even though I’ve been a good friend to you when you’ve needed it.” He looked at Agatha. “Both of you.”
Agatha shook her head. “But . . . but . . . you’re my cat!”
“Your mother’s cat,” said Reaper, “which should have been your first clue that I’m a cat of the Woods, not Woods Beyond. As for my place here, gnomes believe that to be ruled by one of their own is to invite greed, self-interest, and corruption. If a gnome ruled Gnomeland, it would be just as broken as your human kingdoms. Since the beginning, then, gnomes have looked outside their kind for a king . . . a leader who could understand their way of life without abusing his power over it. The answer was obvious. Cats and gnomes are the same: at once friends to humans and indifferent to them. And yet cats are also solitary creatures, content with a bowl of milk and a warm bed. A cat king, then, would do what was best for the gnomes, while keeping apart and letting them live their lives.”
“This is insane!” Agatha barked, finding her voice. “You lived with me! In my house!”
“And I was there!” Tedros touted, stepping next to his princess. “I spent weeks with you in that graveyard! This doesn’t make sense—”
“I’ve been King of Gnomeland for five years and in those five years, I came and went from your side as I pleased,” Reaper told Agatha. “I was with the gnomes when they needed me, just as I was with you when you needed me, with neither of you aware that I was living two lives. If I were a dog, you might