was spreading across his pale neck. I must have hit the mark… right?
He set down his empty glass and appeared to gather himself. “Okay, I might have had an ulterior motive. But it wasn’t to spy on you or evaluate your loyalty. Maybe I simply wanted to enjoy the pleasure of your company.”
Wait, what? He’d been using the tutoring sessions as an excuse to hang out with me?
My mind traveled back over the pastry offerings, the charming smiles, and the eager conversation he’d always made between exercises that I’d been so careful engaging in, wondering what information he was looking to ferret out—had it all been genuine?
A blush flared in my cheeks, probably twice as red as the color now creeping across his face. “Oh,” I said. “I…” I had no idea what to say.
Noah ducked his head and rubbed the back of his neck, the loose strands of his black hair drifting along his jaw. “I guess I can see how you could have misread things. It seemed like an easy way to get to know you better. I thought if you got to know me a little better, you’d be more likely to want to see more of me once I got around to asking about that.”
Noah had been working up the courage to ask me out. Noah Ashgrave, future baron and champion of justice, was interested in me: disowned by my family, not a particularly spectacular mage in any area except illusion, nearly friendless? I couldn’t quite wrap my head around it. The alcohol-induced fogginess probably didn’t help.
I drained the last of my drink. The crisp sear of the vodka didn’t offer any inspiration.
Could this be some kind of trick? An elaborate joke?
I groped for words, and all I came up with was, “Well.” And then, no doubt thanks to that last swallow, “Why?”
Noah let out a rough chuckle. “Is it that hard to believe?”
Kind of? “I just—I’d have figured you’d go for more of a heroic type or something.” Like Declan and all the other older scions had been drawn to Rory. How many of our peers must hate her for taking all four of the most eligible bachelors on campus off the market? Except it was pretty hard to hate Rory once you’d spent any time around her at all, so maybe no one did.
“Who says you’re not heroic?” Noah said quietly, but a hint of his smile had come back. Possibly because I was still discussing this and not telling him he was out of his mind to think he had a chance.
Should I tell him that? It was hard to convince myself to stonewall him when I had the full brilliance of those gorgeous eyes fixed on me. So I focused on convincing him instead.
“Anyone who knows the definition of the word? I—I practically let Rory get convicted of a murder I knew she hadn’t committed and only spoke up for her after she promised me whatever I wanted in return. And what I wanted ended up being an excuse not to have to stand up to my parents and tell them what I actually thought about their plans. And even then I was more concerned about how uncomfortable I’d be pushing the Naries around than how the Naries would feel about it. I fought for the scions more because I was scared of what I’d have to do if you all kicked me back to my family than because of grand principles or whatever.”
“And you’re still here.” Noah eased close enough on the sofa to slip his hand around mine, warm and solid. A tingle shot up my arm. He held my gaze, and I couldn’t look away. “You know what? I think you’re more of a ‘hero’ than someone like Rory.”
When I scoffed, he squeezed my hand tighter. “Rory never had any doubts about what she should do, because she’d been taught her whole life that caring about and protecting people who can’t defend themselves is right. You had to go against the family who raised you, the attitudes they raised you with, all the beliefs you’d had hammered into you since you were a kid… And you did. Even when it was hard. Even when your life was on the line. Hell, right now you’re considering marching off into danger all over again for the rest of us when you could have said no the moment we asked.”
“Because I don’t want to prove everyone who thinks I’m just a selfish