sarcasm and petulance. The idea of having to bare herself to him, to dig up parts of her past that she had intentionally buried to keep herself sane and safe, made her so angry. She was only trying to help him. Why couldn’t he accept that and let her keep her secrets hidden where they belonged?
“Yes, that’s it exactly,” he replied curtly. He wanted to know that she was capable of telling the truth, of letting him in. If she could do that, then he’d be willing to hear her out.
“You have no idea what you’re asking of me, and you’re completely minimizing the impact it will have, but I don’t care because Betty and Jules are in danger, and that’s all that matters. If you’re juvenile enough to think knowing the real me makes a difference then I’ll appease you, even if it crushes me to talk about it. But if I’m doing this it’s not going to be while you have one hand on the door ready to leave. If you want my story, you’re going to get all of it, and you’re going to sit here with me and listen. Also, this never leaves this room. What I tell you about me is my story to tell, not yours.” Piper sat down on the couch and Bobby came and joined her. He had a look on his face like he had won something, something he wasn’t really sure he wanted anymore.
“I’m not trying to minimize this, I’m sorry. I don’t want you to have to dredge up everything about your past just for my entertainment. I want to believe that I can trust you, but you need to show me I’m not making a mistake by doing so. I swear, I won’t tell anyone what you tell me here today.” Bobby wanted to hold her hand, to brush the loose strands of hair out of her face. She looked so tired, so alone. He wanted to hold her and forget all of this, but it was too late now. He needed her to come through for him.
“Promise me that you’ll take what I say about the judge seriously and that you’ll heed my advice. If you guarantee me that then I’ll tell you everything you want to know about me. But remember, Bobby, this is a bell you can’t unring. Once you know where I come from and what I’ve done chances are everything between us will change.” She swallowed hard and could barely believe she was about to share the dysfunctional narrative of her upbringing with Bobby. He nodded in agreement, and she took in a deep breath and tried to start from the beginning.
“My name, my real name, is Isabella Lawson. I haven’t said that name out loud in two years. Can you imagine what it’s like to not be able to say your own name, like it’s a curse word? My father was Roberto Lee Lawson, my mother, Carolina Murphy. They never married. I was what you would call an accident, but that would be a nice way of saying it. I found out as I grew up I was a mistake, a pregnancy that went undetected too long to be erased by an abortion. My parents were neglectful, sadistic drug addicts who spent their entire lives dabbling in one crime or another. My mother would sell her body in order to bankroll her next fix. My father would find out, and after partaking in half of her score, would violently beat her. I was in school only frequently enough to pass my classes and fly under the radar. Half the kids there should have been taken from their parents. The system wasn’t equipped to deal with every bruised child who looked a little hungry. I spent days locked in my room as my parents binged on drugs and threw rowdy parties. I went without eating, without having a bathroom to use. My childhood was one horrific moment after another. The ironic thing is, that’s not even why I’m here. That’s not why I changed my name. It isn’t even the darkest part of my life, and I can already feel you looking at me differently.” Piper stared straight ahead as she spoke. Bobby wanted to put his arm around her and pull her up against him but he hesitated.
“When I was twenty years old, and on the verge of getting the hell out of that place, my mother got arrested again for prostitution.