I’d tried to move. Tried to speak. Tried so hard it felt like my mind was on the verge of breaking. Nothing. A vast chasm of nothingness except my ability to blink.
But he was back, his energy and vigor renewed. And I was about to lose the slightest abilities to interact with him once the sedative finally kicked in fully. That’s when I sought the oblivion. The active ignorance of anything he might do to my body while I was unconscious.
He chained her to the large X he’d placed at the foot of the bed. Her head lolled forward, her eyes closed. I wasn’t sure she was still alive, but that didn’t bother Ethan. At least not yet.
No, Ethan was busy getting his next torture device ready. A blunt length of rebar that he was heating to a fiery orange-red glow. He caressed the rebar with the flame like a lover would his partner’s leg.
I searched my brain for this particular tool in any of the five years I’d been held hostage. My cold and detached personality told me, No. There’s no record of this in our data. I would have frozen in that instant if my body hadn’t already been a paralytic that turned me into a lump of useless tissue and bone.
He’d expanded his repertoire. His library of torture. He was experimenting on the subjects, not just the assistant—me, in this particular instant.
Instead of only researching the brain’s capacity to overcome paralysis in the presence of overwhelming psychological distress, he was looking for ways to cause more damage. Greater damage.
No wonder he’d gone through so many subjects and assistants. He was abusing his toys. He was devolving. Getting reckless. Getting arrogant.
I prayed and pushed at the seeping sedative as it crowded my sight. My thoughts. If I could stay awake, I might be able to call for help when he left me for the night. I’d have eight hours. Eight hours to actively battle my body into motion.
But first. First, I had to make him believe that I was sedated. If I could manage that, then I’d have to find some way to keep myself awake. Awake during a time I’d never experienced conscious thought.
What if he raped me? Used my body in some kind of awful manner?
Would it really be any different than what he’s doing now, the cold side of me asked. At least if you stayed awake, you would have a sliver of a chance to escape. To save those women he’s undoubtedly holding in the basement. Stop being so fucking selfish for once. Think about someone else for a change.
I steeled my resolve. I could do this. I would do this.
I would beat him at his own game. I would stay awake, finally face the horror oblivion had protected me from. If not tonight, I would do it tomorrow. If not tomorrow, the next day. And every day after that until I got free.
Ethan Embry Errington was about to find out what I was really made of. I’d brought humanity and emotions to Ryker Fucking Penn. Ethan Embry Errington was nothing but a new challenge.
One I would overcome. One I would make my bitch.
Chapter 39 – Willow
I clicked back into the room around me. Whimpers ghosted through the room as Ethan shoved the smoldering rebar into the girl’s abdomen. His back was to me. I wasn’t the object of his focus. He was fully involved in his torture.
I forced the cold analytical side of me to the front, demanded she watch, learn. Anything and everything she saw, I wanted to know about it. I spoke with the emotional side of me while she was busy.
We’re going to do this. We’re going to get out of here. We’re going to stop him. Even if it kills us, this ends now.
My conscious ripped open as the colder side of me thrust me back to the forefront of our mind.
Ethan was watching me, a calculating look on his face. “You’re still watching, aren’t you, Willow? I’d hate to think that you were working against me in these experiments.”
I blinked once.
He smiled. It was sweet—one of the first features I’d fallen in love with all those years ago. A mischievous little boy who just wanted me to join him in his antics. The man who would make me smile on the darkest day.
Ryker’s face appeared in my mind’s eye. I shoved him aside. I couldn’t afford to get distracted. Not yet. Not now. Not this close to death