I saw that kind of commitment with the Reapers in Shasta. They don’t love half-ass like Kenny. They take on the burden of lifting up the people they love. That’s why I won’t hold back with Bronco. This new life might not succeed, but it won’t be from a lack of trying.
BRONCO
Desi’s outburst at dinner leaves me tense. She’s a sweet kid, calm even in situations where normal kids would be freaking the fuck out. To see her little face twisted up in sadness or fear pisses me off. I want to know what hurt her, so I can fix it. Even if Sidonie did something or I’m the asshole, I want to fix shit. That’s what I do.
But Desi is fine after talking with Lana and then Sidonie. After dinner, the three of them go outside to play in the balmy summer evening. I stand inside with Carina, who decided she didn’t want a nap. Nearby, Summer stretches out on the couch and texts her friends.
“Are we going on vacation this summer?” she asks.
“I don’t know. Babies don’t travel well.”
“Can’t you ditch her with the aunts or Lana’s people?”
Frowning at my daughter, I catch her smirk. She’s just fucking with me. Screwing with parents is part of a teenager’s daily to-do list.
“Where would you want to go?”
“You know,” she says, smiling wider as she rolls over to her side.
“Well, we could do a few days in Boston without having to ditch the baby anywhere.”
Summer forgets to be a snarky teen and flashes me a big smile. “You’re a good dad.”
Sharing her grin, I nod. “Yeah, I know.”
“Sidonie told me that she loves Lana and Desi.”
“She told me that too.”
“It’ll be good for Sidonie to have a mom,” Summer says, returning to her phone. “She always wanted one.”
My mind returns to Summer as a baby, growing up without a mother around. I remember her in the hospital after the shooting. Then I think of her leaving Elko in a few years. As if I weren’t already in a bad mood.
Outside, Lana plays tag with the girls. She’s unguarded when she doesn’t think anyone’s watching her. I can’t imagine ever getting bored of her smile.
Is this what people feel when they fall in love? I guess that explains how stupid my friends and family have been over the years. Love rips away self-control and common sense. After all, I’ve already moved Lana into my house after knowing her for a few weeks.
While Lana plays with Sidonie and Desi, I carry Carina out the front door after hearing Rooster’s motorcycle returning home. He and I shoot the shit about nothing in particular while the baby sucks at her pacifier under a little flowered hat.
I’m restless, wanting to know why Desi got upset. I also worry about the shit with the Village. I hoped after the Skullz went bust and the Reapers showed no interest in fucking with Elko that my club could get a break for a year or two.
Now the Village assholes are starting shit, and I have to worry about my nephew stabbing me in the back to get his chance at the president’s spot. That’s how life works. It’s just one trial after another until the lights go out for good.
“What’s wrong?” Lana asks later after the kids are in bed, and she’s stripping down for her shower.
I walk to her, probably with too much vigor, and take her by the shoulders. “Why was she crying?”
Lana stares at me with terrified eyes. I’m not holding her roughly. I didn’t raise my voice, but she acts as if I’m about to hit her.
“Did your husband beat you?” I demand.
“No.”
“Then why are you looking at me that way?”
“I don’t know why you’re so angry.”
“I want to know why Desi was upset.”
“Kenny said something cruel.”
Letting her go, I consider how the reason wasn’t anything I guessed for the last few hours. I wish she would have just told me.
“What did he say?”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“Of course, it does. She was crying. Unless that wasn’t why she was upset.”
“He’s jealous of you, Bronco,” Lana says, crossing her arms and putting on her mask. “You have all this money and this gorgeous house. Desi showed him pictures, and he got mad about how his life sucks, and yours doesn’t. He lashed out.”
“How?”
“He said Sidonie was pretty, and Desi wasn’t. Also, that I loved Carina more. He might have been telling her all kinds of ugly stuff since