then.” I didn’t hesitate when the words fell out of my mouth. I didn’t even flinch or second-guess what that entailed. I had hopped on the love train, running full speed ahead, and there was no stopping now.
She flipped around, her hands fisted at her sides, eyes blazing. “Don’t say stuff you don’t mean.”
Yes! A reaction. I’d take it.
“I mean every word.”
Where her features hardened, mine softened. Where she tensed up, I eased up and stepped into her. I wouldn’t touch her until she was ready, though my need to touch her was unbearable.
She shut her eyes and shook her head as though she were trying to shake things off in her head. “Stop, Brad. Just stop.” She hugged her stomach, her gaze dropping to the ground. “Please. Just stop.”
Stop what? Stop being with her? I couldn’t do that.
“Why?” I swallowed, my voice emotionally choked. I took another step closer, needing to be nearer.
“Because …” She trembled and gripped herself tighter as though she were trying to keep herself upright. “Because I want to stop believing you.”
I pulled her in by her waist, unable to resist the urge any longer despite whether she rejected me or not. She fell into me, and I promised myself I wasn’t going to let her go.
“Believe it. Because it’s true. All of it.”
She buried her head in my throat, and she shivered. “I’m scared,” she whispered, true and honest and one of the very reasons I adored her.
“Do you think I’m not? I’m scared about every little move I make. I’m scared that one stupid, idiotic move could ruin what’s happening between us.”
She lifted her head, searching my face.
“I’m not talking other women or things like that because, believe me when I tell you, no one has captured my heart like you have.” My hand went to cup her cheek, and I grazed my thumb against her cheekbone. “I’m talking about your job, what I’ve been saying to my brothers, what I’m saying right now. Asking you to move in with me. Knowing it sounds crazy and not caring that it does. Because it’s what I want, what I want you to want. Worrying about saying how I feel because it might be too much. It might push you away.”
Her eyebrows pulled together, her look pensive. “I’ve been here before. And it didn’t pan out, and I’m scared to do it again because, this time, our relationship is moving faster. It feels different, deeper.” She released a breath. “I knew there was so much at stake when I took the leap into us. My job at first, but now, it’s more than that.” She shuddered against my hold. “I don’t give my heart easily. The last time I did, I was heartbroken.”
I hated that she was comparing me to that asshole of an ex. I would’ve never let Sonia go if I’d had her then, and I sure as hell wasn’t letting go of her now.
I’d remembered our conversation after the wedding ceremony where she had seen Jeff for the first time and cried in my car.
“I mean, why should you care? It’s over.”
She’d responded with my question with such honesty that I truly understood only now because I was in love. “You wouldn’t know anything about this because you’ve never, ever been in love before or had an it person.”
Sonia was my it person. Now and until forever. I knew this with everything that I was. And, as far as I was concerned, I was it for her, too. I’d prove it to her day in and out because nothing mattered more than being together.
And the thought … the thought of losing her … having her walk away from us …
I swallowed.
“I’ve never done this before either. I’m scared shitless, but more than that … I’m more scared to live without you.” My voice was fragile, shaky, honest.
She rested her forehead against mine and let out a deep breath. “Same. That’s the scariest part of being in love, one day living without the other person.”
“Love? Not being together is never going to happen.” My insides soared. “Say it again. That you’re in love.”
She laughed, and it eased every part of me. “You’re such a narcissist, you know that?”
“Say it.” I pulled her in, staring down into eyes I’d grown to know so much.
“I love you, jerk.” Her tone was teasing but tender, and I knew she meant it.
“Say you’ll move in with me.”
“It’s too soon!”
“Who says? The rules in the dating handbook?” The