always been careful. What about you?”
I shake my head. “There’s never been anyone that I needed this badly. I want nothing between us, Deven. I want to feel you and only you.” I rock my hips against her, and she lets out a moan before our lips find one another again. This time, it isn’t like the rest. This time, it’s soft and slow. It’s not hard and fast and rushed. This time, I want to feel every inch of her body with mine. I want to make it last as long as possible. Just thinking about getting off and having to pull out of her has me slowing my efforts even more. With her, getting off isn’t the objective. Being with her, showing her love, passion, and protection—that’s what I want. I may not be her brother, but I’ll protect her like she’s my own because that’s exactly what she is.
Mine.
8
Deven
Oh, Hudson Slade. I knew he’d be better than I could ever imagine, but I never thought he’d be this good. Everything about him is perfect. His smile, his eyes, his hard body, his skills in the bedroom, his protection, his love. I don’t know if he loves me, but every time he touches me, it feels like love. And with every touch, every kiss, every innocent caress, it makes me fall further and further over that line we’re not supposed to be crossing.
We’ve spent the last six hours locked away in his bedroom now and, to be honest, it feels like no time has passed. I wish we could lay here forever. I wish our time would never end. I wish I could stay wrapped around him all night. I wonder what it would be like to wake up next to Hudson Slade. That will never be something I get to experience because we always have to part before either of us can fall asleep to ensure we don’t get caught.
It’s going on three when I finally stand and pull my clothes on. He sits up, the sheet covering his naked lap, as he reaches for me, tugging me back to bed. He rolls us over so he’s hovering above me again.
“Stay,” he whispers, a soft smile spreading across his sleepy face.
I bite my lower lip, wishing he wouldn’t tease me. “I can’t. You know I can’t. We have these rules for reason.”
“Screw the rules.” He lowers his magical mouth to mine and for a moment, I forget the rules myself.
I push him away. “How is it we’ve switched places so easily and without either of us noticing?”
His brows furrow together. “What do you mean?”
“I mean me, the rule breaker, is trying to do this right, while you, goody-two-shoes, throws caution to the wind?”
He laughs. “I have no idea, but suddenly, I like living on the edge.” His grin widens, and I push him away before he can kiss me again and distract me.
I stand up and start pulling on my clothes. “We have to do this right, Hudson. I don’t know what I’d do if Brad found out about us. I don’t want to lose you…or him.”
He pulls me closer and wraps his arms around me, hugging my waist. “I know, and I promise you won’t lose either of us. I won’t let it happen. You’ve lost enough. You won’t lose anything else because of me.”
I run my fingers through his dark hair and he looks up at me, his striking blue eyes finding mine. “I hope not,” I say, pulling away and leaving his room with him watching after me.
Walking out of there feels like I’m leaving half of myself behind. I feel lonely, cold, off in ways I can’t understand or explain. I feel a tear sting my eye just from thinking about losing him or my brother. I don’t know what I’d do without either of them. They’re both a huge part of my life, and losing either one would be like losing a part of my body. I may recover from it, but I’d never get over it. It would always be there, nagging me, creating an ache inside of me that will never be filled.
I grab some clothes and head to the bathroom to shower off before bed. Just as I step behind the stream of water, Hudson walks in, sliding in behind me. I spin around to face him. “What are you doing?”
He shrugs. “I need a shower too. The opportunity presented itself.” He smirks. That’s the smile I love.
“What if