after.'
I smile. 'You need cream.'
'I'm fine. It's all about you.' He settles himself on my bum and squirts some cream on my back.
I jump as the coolness stabs my back. 'Where was the warning?' I grumble.
'Sorry, this might be cold.' He laughs.
I crane my neck around and he dazzles me with his smile, which I know is reserved only for me. I return my head to rest on my forearms. 'You're so handsome.' I mumble dreamily, as he starts working the cream over every inch of my back. 'I think I'll keep you forever.'
'Okay.' he agrees, laughing again.
'Where are you hiding my pills?' I throw the question into the mix casually, and the sudden stilling of his hands tells me I'm so right. He's hiding them, I know he is.
'What are you talking about?'
'I'm talking about the fact that my contraceptive pills have recently been growing legs and running away and it's only been happening since I met you.'
'Why would I do that?' he asks, his hands moving in slow, cautious circles over my back.
Why would he do that? I don't know. Why does Jesse do many of the things he does? He's a fucking mystery, with his challenging ways and unreasonable demands. 'I'm not going anywhere, if that's what you're worried about.'
'No, you're not.' He laughs.
'It's fine. I'll go to the doctor's to replace them.' I say casually, and I'll be hiding them. I have no idea what I'm going to do if I am pregnant. Die on the spot, I think. His hands become firmer on my back, only reinforcing my suspicions. 'You'll just have to wear a condom until I can re-start my course.' I add.
'I don't like wearing condoms with you.' he strains the words out.
'We won't be having any sex then.' I conclude smugly. He is so hiding my pills.
'Watch your mouth!'
I laugh to myself. I don't know why. I should be raging, panicking, worrying. I can't even begin to imagine how he would be with me if I was carrying his child. Holy shit, it would be unbearable. He would wrap me in cotton wool, lock me in a padded cell and guard it for nine months. Jesus Christ. I really hope I'm not pregnant. My life would be over. And how would he be with his children if he's like this with me? Waiting for this period is going to be the longest time of my life.
'You okay?' he asks.
'Fine.' I answer quickly. 'How long has Cathy worked for you?' I ask, diverting the conversation from what is a completely pointless one. He'll never admit it, anyway.
'Nearly ten years.'
'She's fond of you.'
'She is.' he says quietly, and I know he feels the same way about Cathy. By his own admission he couldn't live without her.
'Does she know about The Manor? Ouch!'
'Baby, I'm sorry!' Oh, the fear in his voice. His lips fall straight on my back to kiss me better. 'I'm sorry, I'm sorry.'
'It's fine. I'm fine. Unravel your boxer shorts.' I feel him lift slightly and then the short, sharp connection on his hand across my arse. 'Hey!'
'Don't be clever.' he admonishes me and glides his palm over my cheek.
'Well?' I push.
'Well what?'
'Cathy. Does she know about The Manor?' I feel some cream land on my bum cheek and then his hand working it into the sting.
'Yes, she knows. It's not some secret society, Ava. There are no cloak and daggers. You're done. Up you get.'
'You kept it a secret from me.' I mutter indignantly, sitting myself on the edge of the bed.
'That's because I was falling hard and fast in love with you and it scared me to death to think you would run away from me if you found out.' One brow arches accusingly, and I know what's coming next. 'And you did.' he finishes.
'It was a bit of a shock.' I try to defend myself. The subsequent events after my discovery still make me shudder, and I want to point out that I came back to him after the whole Manor bombshell. It was the drinking that really made me run. 'I knew you were experienced, but I didn't anticipate it was because you owned a sex club that you utilised excessively.' I don't relish the reminder.
'Hey!' He closes in on me and lowers me to the bed dropping a kiss on my lips. 'Let's not re-visit old news. It's all about us, and now and tomorrow and the next day and then the rest of our lives.'
'Okay. Kiss