being ground against one another:
HMM.
Gracie is shocked. She never knew he could talk, if he wanted to…
“It’s not so pleasant,” says Velma, “having to talk in such a manner.”
The gravel shifts again. I DO NOT HAVE MUCH EXPERIENCE WITH IT, says the huge voice contemplatively, BUT I HAVE NOT YET FOUND ANYTHING TERRIBLY OBJECTIONABLE ABOUT IT.
“And you wouldn’t, would you,” says Velma. “You never find anything to be terrible. You’ve never had to struggle.”
There is a silence.
“Do you know who I am?” asks Velma.
I KNOW, says the voice, THAT YOU ARE MY KIN.
“Then what’s my name?”
Silence.
“You don’t know,” says Velma. “There are so few things that are unknown to you. Yet I am one of them.”
I AM SURE YOU KNOW MANY THINGS THAT I DO NOT, says the voice.
“Stop it!” says Velma. “Stop being so…”
REASONABLE?
“Be quiet! Don’t… don’t you understand how shameful this is for you?”
WHY SHOULD IT BE SHAMEFUL?
“Because you’re going to die here today. And you won’t even die knowing the name of the person who killed you. None of them did. They never even knew I was there.”
THEY?
“Yes. I killed Weringer. I killed Macey. I figured out how.” Her words are gleefully, hatefully mad. “Because Mother wanted me to. That’s what She wanted me to do. There was another way. One you didn’t know about, one you ignored. You aren’t so perfect. I don’t know why She loved you so much.”
The voice sighs. I AM AFRAID I MUST TELL YOU THAT YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT THERE.
“Shut up!” snarls Velma. “You always pulled Her away from me! She was always leaving me! Any time we were together, when I brought Her beauties and delicacies and wonders for Her amusement, you always came in and ruined it! You never let Her love me!”
DELICACIES? the voice says. AH… I THINK I REMEMBER YOU. YOU WERE THE LITTLE ONE… HER SERVANT?
“I was more than just a servant!” screams Velma. “She loved me! She would have loved me more if you hadn’t been there! And you don’t deserve Her love! You’re not even… not even First! Do you know that? She didn’t make you first at all! There was one before you, one that went wrong, one bigger and stronger and meaner than you! Did you know that?”
The voice sighs. YES, I KNOW THAT.
Velma appears taken aback. “You… you do?”
YES. I FOUND THAT OUT LONG AGO. AND I MADE MY PEACE WITH IT.
“How… how can you… how can you know and not care!” cries Velma.
THEY HAVE A VERY GOOD SAYING HERE, says the voice. IT GOES—FAMILIARITY BREEDS CONTEMPT.
“What does that have to do with anything!” says Velma. Her voice is almost a screech.
IT MEANS, ONCE YOU COME TO KNOW A THING—ANY THING—YOU TEND TO DESIRE IT LESS. AND IF YOU WANTED MOTHER’S LOVE, BROTHER, I WOULD HAVE FREELY PASSED IT ON TO YOU. BECAUSE, TO BE FRANK, I HAD HAD ENOUGH OF IT.
“What!” says Velma. She almost chokes. “How… how dare you! How dare you say such a… a blasphemous thing! How could you be willing to throw such a blessing away!” Velma sputters for a moment, incensed beyond words. “You don’t deserve to live! And it gets to be me who does it, me who kills you! It’s here, did you know that? The wildling’s in Wink! Why don’t… why don’t I just show it to you?”
Velma flips the top of the cigar box open, then swoops the box up.
Something small, round, and white flies toward the center of the canyon.
Then it stops, frozen, hanging in space as if it’s been grasped by an invisible hand.
Everyone is still. Velma leans forward a little, greedily waiting for… something.
Yet nothing happens. The little round thing—which appears to be a skull—slowly rises up as if it is being brought closer to a set of invisible eyes.
THE TRICKY THING ABOUT THESE TOTEMS, says the voice, IS THAT THEY CAN REALLY ONLY BE USED ONCE.
“W-what?” says Velma.
ONCE THEY’VE TAKEN SOMEONE WHEREVER THEY’RE SUPPOSED TO—IN THIS CASE, TO THE WILDLING, I PRESUME—NO ONE ELSE CAN USE IT AGAIN. IT’S A BIT LIKE A ONE-WAY TICKET. BUT YOU WOULDN’T KNOW WHAT THOSE ARE.
“No,” says Velma. “No! I… I can’t believe it! Who could have used it already?”
THE GIRL, says the voice. WHO ELSE?
“So… it killed her instead of you?” asks Velma, perplexed.
OH NO. IT LET HER LIVE. SHE IS QUITE SPECIAL.
Velma drops the box. “It’s not fair. It’s not fair. Why do you always get away with everything?”
I AM SORRY. I DID NOT KNOW IT