five and get in before the phones started ringing.’
Charlie added some figures to the on-screen spreadsheet.
‘What’s your excuse to be in so early with such enviably white eyeballs?’
Charlie was aware that a marathon sexy stint and lack of sleep had left his pretty blue eyes shot through with pink lines. Early night tonight. He’d give Willow a ring in a bit and make placatory noises and suggest spag bol in front of the telly. It would give him the chance to assess her mood, make peace if required, and practice dodging the “M” word if she brought it up again. Calling her at work also meant she wouldn’t be able to have hysterics of the unfunny kind.
‘Ditto,’ said Ben, interrupting Charlie’s thoughts. ‘I’ve got a report of my own to finish. Incidentally, my eyeballs are always white. Even if I get bladdered.’
‘It’s not natural.’
‘What, getting bladdered?’
‘No, having such white eyeballs.’
‘Here,’ said Ben, reaching into his jacket pocket.
He extracted a small oblong box and lobbed it in Charlie’s direction.
‘Eyedrops. White eyeballs guaranteed. Have them on me. I have more at home.’
‘Cheers,’ said Charlie.
He pocketed the box with a grin, then leant back and stretched.
‘Go and make us both a coffee.’
‘Blimey, I’ve been here two minutes and already you’ve whipped my eyedrops and started giving orders.’
‘Yeah, but I’ve had a heavy weekend,’ said Charlie, yawning.
‘Thought so,’ Ben murmured. ‘Hope she’s worth it.’
Charlie tutted, feigning annoyance. He watched Ben go off to the fancy kitchen at the far end of the floor where Beryl, coffee-maker extraordinaire, usually presided between the hours of nine and five. The hour was still too early for Beryl to make an appearance.
Charlie turned back to his screen with Ben’s words echoing in his head. Hope she’s worth it. The truth of it was, she wasn’t. Not really. She wasn’t even his type, dammit! So why did he find himself repeatedly risking everything he had with Willow? Did he subconsciously want Willow to find out and be the one to do the dumping, saving him the trouble? Not really, because he didn’t want to end it with Willow. He might not wish to marry her, but he didn’t want to let her go either. So why did he behave like this?
Because… because…
His mind struggled to find reasons why.
Willow was pretty. She turned heads. He knew that, even if she didn’t. His girlfriend was kind. She was also very efficient on the home front. The house always looked nice, she was a good cook and she ironed his shirts. Ben’s girlfriend didn’t do that. Usually it was Ben ironing her stuff. Was Charlie, perhaps, staying with Willow out of habit? Maybe. But, then again, he couldn’t imagine life without her. His thoughts looped in circles. He was too young to remember Prince Charles’s embarrassingly awkward moment when asked if he was in love with Princess Diana, or the famous reply of “Whatever in love means”, but like the future king, Charlie presumed that whatever love was it was that that kept him by Willow’s side. He comforted himself with the thought whilst squirting eyedrops in his tired eyes, then thanked Ben for the coffee.
He took a noisy slurp as he mentally ran through what he’d say when he called Willow… preferably without Ben overhearing.
Three
‘For goodness sake, Willow,’ snapped Jean. ‘Whatever is the matter with you this this morning? That’s the third time you’ve misdirected a member of the public. That lady was asking you to help with IT access. Not a tooth abscess.’
‘Sorry,’ Willow mumbled.
‘We have an author due in shortly. She’s giving a talk to the public. Perhaps you could help her set up her display table without losing concentration.’
‘Okay.’
‘And try and look enthusiastic and smile.’
‘Okay,’ Willow repeated.
She must pull herself together. But it was hard when you’d wrecked your own birthday mentioning the M word to a boyfriend with a bachelor mindset.
Willow had devoted hours to privately analysing the whole thing. She’d been too forward. She should have let Charlie do the talking. She’d emasculated him… been too presumptuous… frightened him… scared him off… made him feel trapped. And then she’d got angry and berated herself. She hadn’t been forward enough… she should have grimly hung on to Charlie’s hand thereby denying him escape… then concisely listed reasons to get hitched. Like proving they were committed to each other… publicly celebrating their devotion in front of their family, friends and loved ones… because, dammit, it was also romantic and wonderful and gorgeous, and surely every girl’s dream to