mind cleared a fraction at a time, but I trembled as I pressed up against the wall.
When I had the memory melds, it was as if I was Bishop. I saw what he’d seen, I heard what he’d heard. I felt what he’d felt.
But it was different this time. Something had been very wrong with him.
Watching Kraven die in that memory had shaken me more than anything I’d faced because the person who killed him was the one person I’d quickly come to care about more than anyone else.
And the more I learned about Bishop, the more shaken I became.
Someone who’d done something so horrible, who’d murdered his own brother in cold blood...how was he given the chance to become an angel?
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw someone pass by outside the beaded curtain. My breath caught.
It was Stephen.
Without waiting another second or thinking about it first, I hurried after him, trying desperately to keep him in view through the mass of people.
I finally caught up to him by the stairs, catching his arm. “Stephen!”
He spun to face me. His face was pale, his eyes wild and unfocused. “What are you doing here?”
“I came here to find you.” I turned to frantically scan the club for Kraven and Bishop, but they were nowhere to be seen.
“Leave me alone.” He pulled away from my grip and started up the stairs. I followed after him. My head still swam from the memory meld, but there was no possible way I was going to let Stephen out of my sight now that I’d found him again.
Bishop was right about him being here. Now all I had to do was convince him to help me. I’d been so close at the mall yesterday, I knew it. I’d seen it in his eyes. Witnessing his fear about stasis had changed something inside me when it came to Stephen. For so long now I’d blamed him for my misfortune, for my hunger and troubles. I still did. But he wasn’t totally the villain I’d made him out to be—unrepentant and evil to the core. He was just somebody else in over his head, dealing with the ramifications of his own bad choices.
There had to be a way to help him, too. Being a gray had changed him, but not completely. I’d seen the way he looked at Jordan yesterday. How I knew he wanted to protect her, even if he chose to do so by being a standoffish, passive-aggressive jerk.
There was still good in Stephen. And I was going to give him another chance to prove it to me.
“Where are you going?” I called after him.
“I need to leave.”
“You don’t look so good.”
Stephen glanced over his shoulder as we ascended the stairs. It took all of my energy to keep up with his long strides. “I don’t feel so good.”
He was so pale, even the color of his eyes seemed faded. And he was shivering. The cold was getting worse for him, even worse than it was for me.
My throat closed. “You’re going into stasis.”
He didn’t answer, instead quickening his steps. When we reached the lobby, I didn’t have time to get my coat out of the coat check. If I did, I knew I’d lose him. Instead, I emerged with him through the doors into the night, only the thin cotton of my shirt to protect me from the chill. It would have to be enough.
He walked so fast I had to literally run to keep up with him. “You can’t just keep ignoring me. Please, Stephen. You need to help me. You know you do.”
Finally, he stopped walking and turned to face me when we’d gone about a block from the club. His expression was bleak. “It’s too late, Samantha.”
I shivered, and crossed my arms tightly over my chest to try to stay warm. “I know you’re scared. If you help me, I can help you, too.”
“You think so? Afraid not. Nobody can help me. And nobody can help you, either.”
His words were like a slap—which was how he’d meant them. He was lashing out at me because he felt so desperate and alone. But I wouldn’t let myself be put off that easily. Not tonight. “You can’t lose hope.”
He laughed, a dry and humorless sound that sent a fresh chill down my spine. “Natalie promised me a lot of things when she was still alive. She said it was going to be great. That nothing would get in our way.