short on the phone, and hadn't explained whether he was returning immediately to England or what. This was her big worry. "What's his room number?" she asked.
"I thought you came to see Robin."
"Lena!"
"Two-forty-six."
Shani halted. "Tell Robin I'll be there in a few minutes." She reversed her direction, treading through a herd of nurses and orderlies, feeling like she was climbing the wrong way up an escalator.
"Knock, knock." She rapped on his open door and peered inside. He stood with his back to her folding a shirt in his suitcase. As he turned she noticed an awkwardness in his once mercurial fluidity. Probably his incision was still healing. Had he any regrets? she wondered. His warm smile said that he didn't. He spread his arms. It was the best hug of her life, though rather feeble. Michael had lost weight.
"You look great," he said, holding her at arm's length, admiring her dress. "Is that a new outfit?"
She knew she was blushing. "Just something I dug out of the closet," she lied. It came back to her right away - instant karma. She had forgotten to remove the price tag from beneath her right armpit. Michael was holding it in his hand.
"Sixty-nine, ninety-five." He nodded. "I would say it's worth every penny."
This would have to happen to her! She couldn't decide whether to laugh or weep, and ended up doing some of both. "I bought it yesterday, dammit!" she said, fighting with the tag.
He took a step back, amused at her language. "Well, now that you have my approval, you can throw out the receipt." He threw up his arms, warding off her blows. "Hey, I was only joking! Please, no kidney shots!"
She was easily pacified. She gestured at his suitcase. "I see that you're all ready to go."
"Just about." He returned to his packing. Shani wandered over to the window, from where she could see their parked Porsche, with plenty of room in the back for an extra passenger. There were questions she was afraid to ask.
"How are you feeling, Michael?"
"Great."
"Is your infection gone?"
"Completely."
"That's good." She noticed that her hands were trembling. She went to stuff them in her pockets, then realized the dress didn't have any. He was staring at her.
"What's the matter, Shani?"
"Nothing." She smiled quickly. "How does it feel to have only one kidney?"
"I feel lighter." He folded a pair of jeans. "I should have all my spare parts removed."
"I bet you're anxious to get out of here."
"I sure am."
"I bet the food's been lousy."
"So-so."
"Did you get to see Robin much?"
"Every day."
"I hear she's doing great."
"She looks like a new person."
"That must make you feel good."
"It sure does. I just wish I hadn't waited so long to decide."
"Michael?"
"Yeah?"
"What are you going to do now?"
"Go home." He was collecting his books, preoccupied.
"Right away?" Her heart was breaking.
"Today."
"Is your mother going with you?"
"No, she will be staying with Robin. Could you hand me that notebook, Shani?"
She did so and went back to her window, not wanting him to see her cry. But his hands were on her shoulders, turning her slowly around in spite of her resistance. "What's the matter?" he asked.
"Nothing."
"There must be something wrong."
"No, I'm just... I'm just happy." She plucked a tissue from a box next to the sink and blew her nose.
"It's just such a relief that Robin's okay, that's all."
He believed her, the fool. He was not interested. He did not care. He stepped back to his suitcase, snapping it shut. "Shall we be on our way? I want to say goodbye to Robin."
"I haven't even said hello."
They were in the corridor, and she was counting the steps, trying to slow down time. During these last four weeks, she had constructed a castle in the sky, only to find out now that all that was holding it up was misdirected hope. Why was he bothering to take her hand! "Can we give you a ride to the airport?"
she asked, miserable.
"Can't I get a ride back with you?"
She stopped. "Huh?"
"Oh, is the Porsche too small? Maybe I can catch a cab, then."
"But... ah . . but..." She took a breath, swallowed it. "Aren't you going back to England?"
"Eventually, but I want to attend college out here. The weather's so wretched back in Plymouth. I think I've been spoiled. I consider this my home now." He studied her face. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing." Nothing at all! "Where are you going to go to school?"
"The same one as you - if I can get in this late -