his hand away from her and let her skirt fall down into place.
The door closed shut with a soft click.
Sanity rushed through her. What she’d been about to do—oh, she simply couldn’t! It was all too late for them. For this—
“Let go,” she forced out, moving to twist herself out of his arms.
“Amelia—”
“Let me go!”
Immediately, he released her, and she dove out from behind the screen.
Panting hard to catch back the breath he’d stolen, she stumbled backward, putting the distance of the room between them…because she wanted nothing more than to remain right there in his arms. Oh, even closer than that! She wanted him inside her. And that was the one thing she absolutely could not allow.
He stepped out from behind the screen, slowly, as if she were a doe he didn’t want to startle. “What’s wrong?”
Everything. Simply everything! “I-I can’t—I’m sorry. I thought I could, but…” She pressed her hand against her forehead and breathed deeply to calm herself. But it wasn’t working. Especially when he so rakishly leaned a hip against the writing table and waited patiently for her to explain. Although to explain… A dark laugh strangled in her throat. How could she ever explain this part of her life to him? “I can’t do this.”
“But you want to,” he challenged quietly in a velvety voice that wrapped itself invitingly around her like a warm cloak on a winter’s night. “Why not take what you want?”
The dark temptation of that ached into her limbs and made her breasts grow heavy, knowing he would give her every pleasure her foolish body craved. But that’s all it would be, all it could ever be—only physical, only temporary.
She could never belong to him, not completely. Parting with him when they were younger had been agonizing. If she gave herself over to him now, to love and be loved in return, leaving him this time would be so much worse.
It would end her.
Mistaking her hesitation for uncertainly, he slowly approached her and slipped his arms around her to draw her against him, then leaned down to kiss—
“No,” she whispered, her hand pressing at his shoulder to keep him away.
He stilled, then slowly pulled back until he could stare down at her. The raw yearning she saw in him stole her breath away.
Her heart tore. To surrender and accept the joy that being with him would surely bring—she wanted nothing more. Nothing more!
Yet she somehow found the strength to whisper, “I can’t—we can’t.” A fierce stinging filled her eyes, blurring his face behind her gathering tears. Thank God. Because she couldn’t have borne seeing his expression when she breathed out, “It’s too late for us.”
Thirteen
Amelia hurried back to the ballroom, pushing her way through the crush in her desperation to find her brother. To put an end to all of this. To banish Pearce back into the past where he belonged—
“Frederick!”
She spotted him in the crowd, surrounded by a handful of gentlemen he knew from Parliament. Her blood turned cold. She knew that even now he was pushing for the turnpike, even now using his influence for his own gain.
When she reached him, she inhaled hard for both air and courage. “I need to talk to you.” She eyed the men around them and rested her hand on his arm. “Privately.”
“Not now, Amelia.” He pulled his arm away, then tugged at his jacket sleeves as if her touch had soiled him. “I am in the middle of a conversation.”
“This cannot wait.”
“It can wait, and it will.” He jerked his head toward the refreshments. “Go drink a glass of punch and calm yourself. I’ll find you later.”
The men chuckled at how he’d dismissed her. As if she were nothing more than a child who needed to be scolded by her guardian.
But she wouldn’t tolerate it. Not this time. “I will not assist you with pushing through your trust.” She took a deep breath and announced, “If you want this turnpike, you’ll have to do it without my help.”
That made their laughter choke in their throats. Their eyes darted to Freddie for explanation, but he only glared at her, his face instantly red with anger and humiliation.
As she spun on her heel to leave, he grabbed her arm and hauled her to the side of the room, garnering surprised stares from the men and bewildered looks from the other guests.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” he seethed, so angry that he shook. “I need those men to speed the act through