Touch And Go - Aiden Bates Page 0,86

is worse than missing him. I can’t stop thinking about him. I know I only knew him for a few weeks, and we have this massive age gap and our lives are so different I don’t know how we’ll ever make it work, but he’s all I think about. All I see when I close my eyes. All I want when I’m lying here awake, night after night. Happy now? I said it.”

Matt opened his mouth, then promptly shut it as I paced in front of the television, unable to stop my verbal diarrhea.

“I’ve never cared about the age thing, but maybe he thought I did. I sure as hell mentioned it enough. Called him ‘kid.’ Treated him like he needed me to cut his food into tiny bites, so he didn’t choke. But I knew he was a man. All man.” Matt cleared his throat. “Shut up. You know what I mean. I mean, he was enough to make me never need anyone else. And he was beautiful, Matt. Wasn’t he? He was beautiful.” Matt nodded, and I didn’t care. “I wanted him, and he left me, Matt. Left me standing here with my heart in my gut and my eyes full of tears. I wanted him and he left.” That said it all. Except… “I loved him.” And then, “I still do.”

Matt nodded, his eyebrows knitted tighter.

“What am I going to do, Matt?”

His lip twitched as if he was holding back a laugh, and it made me furious. “Beats me. I’m just here to introduce you to my new computer guy.”

I whipped my head around to glare at him. “What?” If he’d let me go on like that while a stranger listened to everything I said from outside the door, I’d fucking kill him.

“I got a new guy on staff. Maybe you know him?” He spoke like it was the most normal thing in the world to walk in on my emotional crisis to introduce me to one of his employees.

“How would I know him?” I didn’t spend a lot of time in the security world. All I knew about it was to disable the alarm on my car, I pushed a button and to disable the one on the Vanguard Tower, I pushed a few buttons. I looked down at my crumb-covered sweats and then at Matt. “You could’ve told me I was going to a meet and greet. I would’ve put on some salsa to go with the chips.”

He chuckled and stood with a smug look on his face.

“If you open that…” My threat died as he pushed the door fully open, and my heart stopped. Seb. Staring at me. “Seb…” At my door. In the Tower. Here. So close I could’ve touched him. Well, I’d have to take a few steps, but close. And beautiful in all black.

“Is it true?” His voice was quiet and quivered, but it still hit me like a bullet. “You love me?”

As though Matt had proudly performed his duty, he clapped Seb on the back, slipped out, and left us alone.

26

Sebastian

“Order yours today and get not one, not two, but three bonus replacement blades for The Magic Peeler and Zucchini Curler!” The television filled the silence between us, and the screen flashed blue and white light onto Derek’s face. I couldn’t take my eyes off him, and I couldn’t unhear the words he’d spoken to Matt. And more than anything, I wanted to hear him say them to me. And I would wait all night if I had to.

I’d heard all the reasons we shouldn’t be together, all of his insecurities laid out, and I heard him say he loved me anyway. That was all that mattered—he loved me. The words echoed in my mind over, and over, and over…but now he stood in front of me, mute, eyes wide and locked onto mine.

“Do you?” I stepped into the room and let the door slide shut behind me.

He gave a slight nod, and I looked down. He was barefooted, and his toes curled, grabbing onto the rug like he was bracing for a blow. “I…do.” He cleared the huskiness so his voice came smooth, deep, as sexy as I remembered. “Being away from you has been hell. I…love you, Seb.”

Every emotion I’d ever had flashed through me, propelling me across the room into his arms, off the floor, so I could cling to him, hang on like my life depended on it. I kissed him, hard, and his passion matched