a faraway look. “I’ve never really been out of Lincolnshire.”
He came around the bench and sat down beside me.
“Well,” I said. “You should go. Just to see it. At least once, anyway.”
“No thanks,” he said.
“You’d like it. There’s so much to see and do. I think everybody should go at least once,” I said.
“I like it just fine in Lincolnshire,” he said.
“You know,” I said. “My uncle says Lincolnshire is a place you pass through, not end up.”
Torch stiffened beside me.
“No, no,” I said. “Oh, I didn’t mean it like that.”
He looked at me. “How did you mean it?”
I felt like a jerk. God. I had that sense again like Torch and I were just two different species. I found his opinion of me mattered deeply. And that would have made my mother laugh as well. At the moment, I felt nothing but hate for her.
“You were born here?” I asked.
Torch looked down. “Yeah. Dexter Street. Right over there.”
He pointed across the water. I saw a row of small houses on the opposite bank.
“You lived on the water?” I asked. “That must have been nice as a boy.”
He tilted his head. “It was a shit hole. Still is. I had to fish out there if I wanted to eat. Things are better now. Cleaner. But I still wouldn’t feed anything I caught from the Maumee River to a dog.”
I couldn’t fathom it. “Where were your parents?” I asked. I knew I was prying, but I had the strong sense Torch wanted to talk about it.
“Gone,” he said. “I lived with an aunt for a while. That was her house. She wasn’t around a lot either. And then ... she died. I was maybe seven, I think.”
“Did you have any brothers or sisters?”
“Don’t know,” he said. “Heard a rumor my old man had another family. But I also heard rumors he wasn’t really my old man.”
“What happened to your mom?” I asked.
“Dead,” he said. “She was a junkie. So was he. They all were.”
“Torch, I’m so sorry. That must have been so hard for you.”
It hurt to think of Torch as a young, scared little boy wondering where his next meal might come from. I wanted to reach back through time to help him.
“The club is your family now,” I said.
“The club is everything I am,” he answered. “I’d be worse than dead without them. Amy’s old man, Ace. When I was twelve or thirteen, I did odd jobs for him. He was the former V.P. He was going to give me a job when I got out. He died though.”
Torch’s voice trailed off.
“Got out of where?” I asked.
He kept his gaze fixed on the water. A beat passed, and I knew he wasn’t going to answer.
“What was it like?” he asked.
“What was what like?”
“Having everything you ever needed?”
I looked down. “My parents had money. That’s not the same thing as having everything.”
Torch let out a bitter laugh. “Sure.”
“It’s not,” I said. “I’m not that much of an asshole to sit here and compare my childhood with yours. But if it was so great where I come from, I’d still be there.”
Something dark flashed through Torch’s eyes as he regarded me. I can’t help it. It ignited a deep desire inside of me. He was dangerous. I could feel it. And yet, I just wanted to get closer.
“Are you sorry?” I asked. “That I came here?”
“Are you?”
I took a breath. “No. I mean, most of the time I don’t know what I’m doing here. It’s crazy. I know what everyone thinks. Hell, even my parents think it. But this isn’t me sowing some kind of wild oats. I’m not rebelling. I’m not trying to find myself. Well, maybe a little bit that last thing. It’s just ... more about ... taking control. Deciding things for myself for the first time in my life.”
Torch reached for me and brushed a hair out of my eyes. “What is it that you think you want?”
Maybe he meant it as an innocent question. Small talk. I don’t know. But the moment he said it, fire sparked in my heart. I didn’t have all the answers, but I knew one thing. I wanted him.
I leaned in and kissed him.
My heart racing, I pulled back. I could feel the blush rising in my cheeks. What had I just done?
Torch’s eyes smoldered with lust. Oh God. Heat pooled at my center. My whole body trembled.
A beat passed. Then another.
Then Torch moved in. His hand slid around my neck.