a top-ten draft prospect...and everything changed.”
The list had come out in January of Neil’s senior year. They’d all known being on it meant there was a better-than-good chance that he’d be drafted that June.
She’d given him her virginity that April. Had been with him as many times as she could from that point on until he’d walked away from her.
She crossed to the edge of the porch, stared out at the dark night. “You were slipping away from me,” she admitted. “I knew it was only a matter of time before I lost you for good. I was just a kid. And I was terrified. Desperate...” But none of that excused her behavior. The lies. The manipulation. “It was the only way I knew to hold on to you.”
“Maddie,” he said from behind her. “Look at me.”
She didn’t want to but knew avoiding him was the coward’s way. And she needed to look into his eyes when she told him.
Hugging her arms around herself she turned. “I lied to you,” she said hoarsely, her throat burning. “Bree wasn’t an accident. I got pregnant on purpose.”
She held her breath and waited for him to say something, anything. Told herself that no matter how hard it was, she’d accept his anger as her due, would face it head-on.
Only to have her head snap back when he nodded once and said, “I know.”
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
“YOU...YOU KNOW?” Maddie asked, her eyes huge, her face pale in the moonlight. “I...I don’t understand.”
Neil stabbed his fingers through his hair. “I wasn’t positive. When you first told me you were pregnant, I was too stunned to even consider the possibility that you’d done it on purpose.”
He’d been too concerned about his dreams slipping away. “But then I started to wonder...and suspect.”
He hadn’t pushed her to have sex, hadn’t wanted to rush into anything because he’d been afraid of being stuck in a relationship, in Shady Grove. He’d been scared of getting too serious. And he hadn’t wanted to hurt her. Hadn’t wanted to use her.
She’d made the first move, had told him she was ready, that she’d gone on birth control and had wanted to surprise him. She’d told him she loved him, that she wanted to show him how much.
Their initial time had been quick and awkward. He’d hated hurting her but she’d insisted he not stop. With time and practice, they’d gotten better, had found ways to be together as often as possible, usually at Maddie’s prodding. He’d been so wrapped up in her—so thrilled to be having sex—he’d bought it. Had eaten every word she said and asked for seconds. He hadn’t been able to resist her. And that was why she’d been so dangerous to him.
He thought of how, not ten minutes ago, he’d been making love to her. Her scent clung to him, his fingers tingled to feel the softness of her skin again. Hell, she was still dangerous to him.
“Were you ever on the pill?” he asked, watching her closely.
“No,” she said, her voice ragged. “No.”
There had been a time when he would have been thrilled to see that guilt in her eyes. To hear the worry in her voice. A time when all he wanted was her confession. And his own vindication.
Until he’d realized he didn’t deserve absolution. Not when he’d been equally to blame.
He exhaled, felt as if it was the first time he’d been able to do so since he’d found out she was carrying his child. “Glad the truth is finally out.”
He started walking down the stairs.
“Wait.” She rushed past him to the bottom of the stairs, held out her hands as if to touch him, but then curled her fingers into her palms. “Where are you going?”
Since he didn’t want her running after him down the dark driveway in her bare feet, he stopped. “I’m leaving.”
“But...we need to talk about this.”
“Why?”
She frowned, looking confused and young with her hair coming out of her braid, her clothes wrinkled. “Because we have to resolve this,” she said, sounding more like herself. Bossy. In control. Right. “We’ll go inside, I’ll make some coffee and—”
“What’s the point? It’s over. Done.” And nothing good ever came of peeling open old wounds. Not when those wounds were still capable of bleeding. Not when he was still struggling to accept what she’d done. “Please remind Bree that I’ll pick her up after her soccer practice Monday.”
“You’re not walking away from me,” Maddie growled, grabbing on to his forearms, her fingers tense, her voice heated.