to take it.”
“You don’t have to worry about me. I’ll stay clear of her unless I have to.”
“Gaden?”
“If you collect some of her slick on a cloth, that’d probably be sufficient to produce a sperm sample.”
“Gaden…”
“My mate is dead, so my days of…‘rutting’ are over. I’ll keep that fuck off our backs, but that’s it. Dry her off. She’s starting to shiver.”
And then my world narrowed down to my skin, the steady drag of towels whisking all the water away, rubbing through my hair.
“Leave her with me for tonight.” I was laid down on a soft surface, still shivering, until more heavy soft things were pulled over me. I buried my face in the pillow, breathing in the scent of Jai, which was always able to slow my heart rate or speed it up. Exhaustion felt like a great smothering weight, forcing my consciousness away from the here and now, away from what might hurt me. Tomorrow, it promised. There was always tomorrow.
“For tonight then, but we’ll need to work out a way around this that will avoid conflict. I think that would hurt your mate the most.”
“It’s what stops me from ripping your fucking throat out where you stand. She’s what’s between me and you.”
“Then we agree. The beautiful one is the one we protect, yes? We work together for her.”
“For her.”
Chapter 31
Sleep was an ocean, and every time I started to surface, I dived back down again. That was, until Jai stirred beside me.
“You can’t stay here forever, Shan.”
I grunted my extreme disagreement with that statement.
“You set stuff in motion, Shannon. Now it's time to see it through.”
My eyes flicked open, and my heart felt like it went from zero to one hundred in twenty seconds.
“I’m sorry.” Those were the first words out of my mouth. “I’ve hurt you.”
I forced my eyes to open, to take in Jai’s expression, his reaction. I did this, and I was going to have to face up to it. But what I saw shocked me.
There was something terribly warm and intense about Jai, like a hot bath I could sink into. I frowned when I saw that in his eyes. No recrimination, no pain, just…love, a damn scary word if there was ever one.
“I’m sorry,” I repeated, as if that would provoke the right response, but his expression stayed the same as he rolled towards me, hauling me up close and pressing his mouth to mine.
“You don’t like hurting people,” he said between kisses. “You’ve never liked people, animals, anything being in pain. You feel theirs, don’t you?”
“The guys?” He nodded. “Sort of. Like Zane? I think his only pain is his blue balls, but Caleb? It was hurting him, them, the whole thing. Hollingsworth is using me as another means to torment them. They can’t touch me, they can’t connect with me. He’ll do it over and over again, every day that we’re here. This way, there’s a buffer, and the pace isn’t being forced. I can choose what we do or don’t do, at least for a little while.” I laid my head against his chest, keeping my voice little more than a breath. “You know I’ll only love you, right? You’re my mate. It’s always been you for me.”
His gaze didn’t change. If anything, it softened, but he shook his head slowly.
“I’ll never doubt that you love me, but I don’t think you realise the capacity of your heart. You connect with people all the time.”
“If it wasn’t for Janey, I’d be alone whenever I wasn’t at work!”
“But when you’re there, you gave everything you had, didn’t you? You like to help people—no, you have to help people. You’ve never been good at saying no to those in need, and now these shifters need you. So if you’re stepping up, we need to work this out.” He buried his head in my neck, breathing me deep. “Everything that’s in me tells me to tear their faces off for even looking at you.”
“But?”
“But this is part of being your mate. I just want to be clear about what will and won't happen.”
Jai left the bed and went to get everyone, leaving me alone with the heat imprint of his body. I tensed when they all padded in.
Shifters were hard to be around. Our male ideal was big, broad, muscular, strong, and they had this in spades. I could have easily persuaded myself I was on the set of Magic Mike right now, except Channing Tatum had nothing on these guys.