watches me. But the strangest part is the top of her aura. It goes fuzzy, then pink, like cotton candy.
She’s staring straight at me . . . and feeling love? I think she must be confused, but that stare of hers is potent, and I can’t look away.
“Hi there,” I say to her. “What’s your name?”
She points at me and says, “Bambo.”
I look up at Zania, whose forehead scrunches. Both she and Kope crouch on either side of the girl, but she pays them no attention. Her eyes are on me.
“Her name is Alile,” Zania tells me. Ah-LEE-leh. “It means ‘she weeps.’”
“Alile,” Kopano says to the girl. “Zikuyenda bwanji?”
“She speaks Chichewa,” Zania whispers. Anna scoots closer to me.
Alile’s guardian angel dips low to whisper, and the darkness in her aura lightens. It is highly unusual for most adults, much less a child, to be this open to the spirit. The girl walks toward me and I hold my breath, curious and a bit nervous.
I remain very still as she reaches out to touch my face with dry, dusty hands. Her face is close to mine, and it’s like she can’t get deep enough into my eyes. She keeps a small, cool hand on my cheek and climbs confidently into my lap, sitting. She speaks clearly up at me again. “Bambo.”
Something is happening here. I don’t know what, but it’s making me dizzy with anxiousness. I can’t look away from Alile, but in my peripheral vision I see Kope and Zania staring at each other.
“What does Bambo mean?” Anna whispers.
Kopano clears his throat. Pauses. “It’s a word for father.”
Holy mother . . .
If I wasn’t sitting down already I might pass out. Father? But why on earth . . . ? I look down at the delicate girl, who is now patting at my shirt, checking me over.
Zania begins to sign. She came to us from another orphanage that shut down because of sexual abuse.
My gut sours and tightens. I look at Anna, whose face is horrified. My teeth grind as I think about this poor little girl. She is so small. She’s been a victim of heinous acts in a world I’m all too familiar with. It’s no wonder her aura is so dark. I want to find and kill whoever touched her.
Kopano speaks to Alile in Chichewa, and Zania interprets.
“He tells her Kaidan is his friend and wants to know why she calls him Father.”
I hold my breath as Alile leans against me with complete comfort and familiarity, her head turned toward Kopano as she answers him. Again Kope clears his throat.
“She says, ‘In my dream, he was my father.’”
I can’t breathe. I . . .
This girl dreamed of me. It had to be an angel, or else she has a very special gift that few are given and few are privy to. My eyes dart to Anna and she seems to be holding her breath, eyes wide with wonder. This is huge. This cannot be brushed aside or laughed off or ignored.
I try to imagine leaving this orphanage with Onani and Mandala, leaving this little girl behind. A fierce, urgent, possessive urge rises up in me like a windstorm and I wrap my arms around her. I will not leave her. I will never let anyone hurt her again.
She’s my daughter. A gift. A blessing. Something I never thought I wanted, but now I’d fight anyone who tried to take her from me. My heart stretches wide to let her in, and I am full with the rightness of it. Alile snuggles closer, as if her home is right there in my lap. When the burn begins behind my eyes and the moisture builds, I’m too overcome to bother stopping it.
The tears are hot on my cheeks, and I wipe them away. I don’t feel weak. In fact, I’ve never felt stronger. Anna takes my hand and I hold tight to her. Onani and Mandala play at our feet, the baby patting Alile’s bare foot.
My wife. My sons. My daughter.
I will do right by them. I swear it. I am my father’s son, but he does not live in me. This, right here, is who I choose to be. I imagine the Maker, Belial, Patti, Mariantha, and all the angels smiling down on me, saying, “It is good.”
And I have to agree. It’s damn good.
Duke Names and Job Descriptions Index
Duke Name: Focus: Job Description: Neph Children (those mentioned in story)
Pharzuph (Far-zuf): Lust: craving for carnal pleasures of the