glance, leaving my mom and dad on the steps, looking perplexed, not sure if they should be proud or insulted.
We were mostly silent during the short drive back to my apartment, each of us lost in our thoughts. I hoped the evening wouldn’t scare him off. I studied his face in the meager light of the passing streetlights. He seemed less angry than when we were at my parents’ house, so I supposed that was a good sign. He helped me up to my place and I said good night, hesitating on the threshold. I wasn’t anxious for him to be gone, but I had to get up early for work. He brushed a hand lightly over my hair, tucking a strand behind my ear and fondly caressing my cheek.
I sighed and closed my eyes, some of the tension from dinner leaving me. “Thank you for what you said. It was nice of you to stick up for me.”
He knelt down in front of me so that he could look me in the eyes. “I meant every word of it,” he said intently. “They treat you like a disappointment. They should be ashamed.” His tone was short, irritated.
I shrugged. “I’ve put them through a lot in the last five years,” I said, fighting a nagging headache. “I am a disappointment. I’ll never go to college- I can’t keep up and I wouldn’t be able to handle the stress. I’ll never be a lawyer or a doctor.” I gestured at my wheelchair. “And I’m not really in the position to give them a lot of grandkids. I’m a dead-end.” I clenched my teeth, surprised that I had just said all that.
Peter leaned forward and kissed me gently, his soft lips full of promise. I met him urgently, soaking in the feeling of being wanted and accepted. He leaned back for a moment and I saw that his eyes had gone all silvery.
“Don’t buy into their disenchantment,” he said seriously. He held up a hand to forestall my protests. “I can imagine your parents have been through a lot of heartache, and fear, and pain. I know they love you. I don’t think they hurt you on purpose… but they do hurt you. I saw it in your eyes tonight. I hear it in your words every day.”
I looked down at my hands. He placed a finger under my chin and raised my head, forcing me to look into those chilling silver eyes. “And more than that, I see it in everything you do. Some part of you believes you aren’t good enough- that you don’t measure up to whatever it is you call normal. Don’t do that to yourself, Melody. And don’t let others make you feel that way. You’re perfect, just as you are. I wouldn’t change you for anything in the world.”
He kissed me again, and I tangled my hands in his silky hair as his tongue dipped into my mouth. His fangs elongated and I felt their hard smoothness beneath his skin. A shiver of need stabbed through me and I sighed against his lips, wanting more. He drew away at last, leaving me reeling.
“I love you.” He said softly. Then he stood and was gone faster than thought.
I made my way slowly into my apartment and shut the door. Then I burst into tears. If he truly felt that way, then why did he leave? Even though he said I was special- went so far as to say that he loved me- even he treated me as less than normal. If I were a normal woman, he would be here with me right now, making love to me, maybe even sinking his teeth into me.
Instead, I was here alone. I knew that it stemmed more from his need to protect me than complete disinterest - I had pulled his darker instincts into play after all- but that was the very thing I detested. He wouldn’t feel that he needed to be careful not to take advantage of me if he didn’t think I was impaired. Even with Peter, I was disabled.
Chapter 5
We sat in the back of the library as I picked at the last of my cold chicken sandwich. I had been left in charge of the place over the lunch hour today, and Peter was keeping me company. This section of the library was equipped with a big old wing backed chair and a love seat. Peter had lifted me over to the love seat,