twenty years older than her, and no fuckin’ way should I have the thoughts I do about her, but fuck if I don’t wish I could pin her to a wall and make her scream my name so fuckin’ loud, Jesus couldn’t save her.
It’s been two years since she was standing at our gate, begging to be let in, begging for us to help her and her sister. At first, she was just a job to me, watching over her, making sure she’s taking care of herself. I soon learned she didn’t know how to fuckin’ do that, so I started doing it for her. I made sure she ate and showered, and I taught her shit about everyday life. But over time, she started to change. For one, her figure filled out because she’s healthy now. It’s more than that, though. Her chocolate eyes seem to have some life back in them, something that was missing before. Coming to us broken and practically naked, she is coming out of her shell in very small ways, and thanks to Snake’s Ol’ Lady, Victoria, she has clothes to wear. She wasn’t a teenager; she was twenty-six then, and now, she’s twenty-eight with her whole fuckin’ life ahead of her. However, even though she has evolved, in some ways, she still remains locked inside of herself, terrified of the outside world.
She’s not the only one who’s changed with time. I’ve changed also, or I should say my thoughts and feelings about Haven have changed. Somewhere along the line, she stopped being a job and became my priority. What I thought of as an innocent desire to protect her has transformed into a wild obsession where I need her to need me. Once I started seeing her as a woman, those lustful thoughts started playing in my head. Thoughts of wanting to possess her, wanting to claim every goddamn part of her fuckin’ body. I know I can’t act on my urges, cravings, desires, but fuck if I’m going to allow another man to ever fuckin’ touch her.
So, instead of trying to help her grow into an independent woman, I’ve been fuckin’ selfish and allowed her to continue to live inside her fear. I’ve allowed her to get comfortable within these four walls. She’s my weakness, my kryptonite. For two years, she’s looked at me as if I’m her goddamn savior, her protector, the only person in this fuckin’ world, and because of my selfishness, I want to keep it that way. I want her to believe I’m the only one who can give her everything she needs in this world.
A slap on my shoulder pulls me out of my thoughts. Turning my attention away from a sleeping Haven, my eyes meet Snake’s. “Have you told her we’re moving yet?” His voice is low enough only I would be able to hear.
Shaking my head, my gaze travels back to her. “No.”
He groans, “Storm, we’re moving to the new compound in two days. Ace hasn’t talked to Chapel either. Don’t you two think you need to prepare them? After all they’ve—”
My eyes snap back to Snake. I growl deep and low, keeping him from going on with talking about bullshit that I already understand has to happen. “I fuckin’ know, but fuck, she feels so fuckin’ safe here. How do I take that away from her?”
“I don’t think it’ll matter where we go as long as you’re there. It’s you she feels safe with, Brother, not just these four walls.” Snake searches for something within my stare. “It’s not just telling her that worries you, is it?”
My brows pull down tightly into a frown. “The fuck you talking about?” I play it off like I don’t know what he’s going on about, but the reality of it is I do.
His head tips up, and he chuckles as if he’s figured it all out. “You’re scared to move her to the new club. You think she might take an interest in someone else.”
I narrow my eyes and glare at him. “Shut the fuck up. I ain’t scared of shit.”
He laughs harder, but it quickly dies. “This isn’t good, Storm. You have to figure your shit out and deal with her.”
“You think I don’t realize that?” I seethe, gritting my teeth together.
He sighs heavily. “You’re my vice president, and I’ve known you for a long time, Storm, but I’ve never seen you act like this over a woman. We were supposed to help them and then