huffily turned around and Leah smothered her laughter as best she could. Her husband certainly wasn't helping matters any. He was making faces at the old biddy, which caused Leah to giggle all the more.
The woman turned around once again and Leah nearly choked in her effort to keep from laughing outright. Once she'd composed herself, she scooted down in her seat and leaned her head against Andrew's shoulder. She hadn't laughed this much in one day since . . . she couldn't remember when. It didn't matter, she was laughing now and it felt incredible. When had she allowed her life to become so cheerless? Time had slipped between her fingers with barely a notice.
Scotty was a delight, and she loved him until her heart felt as if it would burst. He would be about the same age as the baby they'd wanted to adopt. In some unexplainable way, Leah had transferred the love she had stored in her heart for the child taken from her. Pam must have understood that because she and Doug had asked Leah and her husband if they'd be Scotty's godparents.
In the last couple of years they'd done their duty and bought Scotty birthday and Christmas presents, but that had been the extent of their commitment. He held a special place in her heart, but Leah realized now that she'd cheated Andrew and herself out of the pleasure this child could bring into their lives.
Loving Scotty frightened her. She feared she might become overly attached to her friend's son. The pain of the lost adoption had cheated her out of enjoying Scotty the way she should. She'd feared that if she became overly attached, he'd be taken from her too.
The movie ended and the lights came up. Scotty yawned and, sitting up, rubbed his eyes.
"How you doing, big boy?" Andrew asked.
Scotty blinked several times, as if he'd forgotten where he was and who he was with. A look of panic came into his eyes as he glanced around the theater, and then to Leah.
"Remember, Mommy and Daddy went to dinner," Leah reminded him.
He nodded, but he didn't seem overly happy about it.
"I bet you're hungry," Andrew said, lifting him onto his shoulders. Andrew waited until the aisle was clear and then led the way out of the theater. It was dark by the time they reached the parking lot and the stars glittered like a splattering of diamond dust tossed across a bed of shiny black satin.
"Want to make a wish?" Leah asked.
Scotty looked to the heavens and nodded. He closed his eyes and drew in a deep breath, releasing it all at once. His eyes flew open and he grinned broadly.
"I bet he misses Diane and Jason," Andrew said, unlocking the car door.
"Nope," Scotty said. "I like you better."
"Don't get a big head," Leah warned her husband, under her breath. "He'd say the same thing to anyone who gave him horsy rides and took him to the movies."
"Maybe so," Andrew agreed, "but it's me he loves."
"Auntie Leah too."
Leah planted a kiss on his chubby cheek. "That's telling him, kiddo."
It wasn't until much later, hours after they'd finished the dinner dishes, long after they'd read Scotty a story and tucked him into the guest bed, that the emptiness surrounded her.
The night was dark and moonless as Leah slipped out of her bedroom and wandered into the room where Scotty slept. Standing over his sleeping figure, she gazed down on this perfect child who belonged to her friend, and held the pain of her loss tight within her soul.
She finally moved and walked over to the closet. Standing on her tiptoes, she brought down the baby book she'd hidden there.
Sitting in the silence and the dark, she held the book in her lap and turned each empty page until she'd made her way through the entire satin-covered book. From newborn to the space for the high school graduation photo. When she'd finished, she pressed the book against her heart and rocked back and forth as if she were holding the long-awaited child in her arms.
Instead she clung to a hollow dream.
Jody gasped.
Jeff alive! It wasn't possible. She could hear her mother-in-law continue speaking but the words were unintelligible and seemed to come from a far-off distance. It was then that Jody realized she'd dropped the phone and had backed away.
"Jody." Glen was there and she turned and buried her face in his chest. "What is it?" he asked, his words as gentle as the arms