My face twisted, more tears breaking loose as I shook my head over and over again. “But, that’s just it,” I said, pulling free from his grasp. “You don’t understand. And you never could.”
“Ruby—”
“I have to go,” I said, sniffing back the last of my tears with a new resolve. I skirted around him, flinging the door open and climbing down the ladder on the tree without another glance in his direction.
Noah called out to me the entire way down, calling my name and telling me to wait — begging me to wait. I swore my chest would explode any moment if I didn’t put distance between us, and the cool rain splattering against my hot skin was the only welcome relief I found in the meantime.
“Wait,” he said again when we reached the bottom. His hand caught the inside of my elbow and he spun me around, his eyes wild now, frantically searching mine. “Please. Don’t do this. Don’t leave, don’t walk away from this, from…” He swallowed. “Don’t walk away from me.”
I let out an audible sob at that, ripping away from his grasp.
“You can’t walk all the way back,” he said when I turned. “It’s raining. It’s at least a mile.”
“I’m fine,” I said through my tears, through the rain, through the rolling thunder. I took out my phone, using the flashlight app on it to light my way.
“Damn it, Ruby Grace!”
Noah ran to catch up to me, blocking my path as the rain pelted down on us. His hair stuck to his forehead, his eyes transitioning to my favorite steel color as a crack of lightning sprawled across the sky.
“I love you.”
The words knocked the breath from my chest, and I shook my head, trying to move around him.
“You love me, too,” he said. “And you don’t have to say it for me to know it. But what you do have to do is stay. Right now. You have to be brave, and you have to stay.”
“I can’t,” I whimpered.
“Why not?” He stepped into me, hands reaching forward, and this time, I didn’t rip away when his hands found my arms. “Just tell me why. Tell me the real reason why, and I swear, I’ll leave you alone.” His hands trailed up, framing my face. “If that’s what you want.”
Noah swallowed at that, like the words tasted as bad as they sounded. He lowered his forehead to mine, and both of us inhaled a breath that sounded like a roar of thunder.
“I promise I will,” he said again, this time softer. “But I don’t want to. I want you to stay. Please, Ruby Grace. Stay.”
His lips found mine, hard and pleading, and I melted into him, my hands tugging at his wet shirt as another crack of lightning split the sky. I took that kiss selfishly, eagerly, opening my mouth and letting him slide his tongue inside as I moaned and leaned into him even more.
I wanted him to brand me.
I wanted to brand him.
For as long as I lived, I knew I’d never forget that last kiss with Noah Becker.
But when the lightning was gone, the thunder rolling behind it, I broke free, panting, and I didn’t meet his eyes when I said the last words I’d ever say to him.
“Don’t follow me.”
With that, I was gone.
Noah
Two weeks.
Those words were on repeat in my head Sunday evening as I sat with all my brothers on Mom’s front porch, holding a full beer in my hand, knowing I couldn’t stomach even one sip of it. I hadn’t touched anything Mom had made us for dinner, either.
Two weeks.
I counted the days, the hours, the minutes and seconds that fit inside that time period.
It was only fourteen days. Three-hundred-and-thirty-six hours. Twenty-thousand-one-hundred-and-sixty minutes. One-point-two-million seconds.
And then, she would be Ruby Grace Caldwell.
My fist tightened around the can, a bit of the beer spilling over the side as I fumed at that fact. I knew I shouldn’t have gone to church, shouldn’t have put myself in her vicinity where I could stare at her and sit in my misery like a masochist.
But I had to see her.
After she left that night, I followed her even though she told me not to. I had to make sure she made it back to her car okay. But, I stayed back, gave her space, and once she was in her car, I did as she asked me to.
I left her alone.
I thought she’d call, or text, or send a fucking smoke signal.