stuff but prostituting myself is where I draw the line.”
“Actually, it wouldn’t be prostitution since we’re not paying you,” Hunter points out, and I roll my eyes at him. But he only grins. “And we don’t want you to sleep with him. We just want you to fuck with his head a bit and make him think you’re going to.”
“I think you’re overestimating my ability to charm someone over,” I stress. “That’s more Dixie May’s thing. I usually rub people the wrong way. You guys should know that already since I managed to piss you all off the first day I met you.”
“Actually, you just pissed Zay off,” Hunter reminds me. “And honestly, I think he was more shocked at your defiance than pissed off.”
“I wouldn’t go that far,” Zay mutters as he wipes his fingers off on a napkin. “But I do think she might be able to pull it off with a little bit of training.”
“Dude, I’m not a dog,” I tell him as I pop a chunk of sausage into my mouth.
“I’m not saying you are,” Zay replies, tugging at the sleeves of his shirt. “But you’re gonna have to learn to be more cooperative if you want this to work.”
“Why would I want this to work, though?” I question. “I mean, all that’s really in it for me is that I get to become part of you guys’ circle. Which, according to you, offers me protection. But honestly, the only threat I’ve seen so far is you guys.”
“Which mean, if you’re not in our circle, we’re a threat to you,” Jax stresses as he finishes up the last of his eggs. “Something you should consider before making your decision.”
“Is that a threat?” I ask, carrying his gaze.
He shrugs. “You already know enough about us to know that we’re a threat to anyone outside of our circle.”
True. And that should be enough for me to walk away. In fact, I should just get up now and do that. Forget I ever spent any time with these guys. But I can’t bring myself to do so.
I try to convince myself that the reason I can’t is because I want to find out if I’ve ever met Zay, if there’s any truth to the dream I had last night. In reality, that’s only part of the reason. The other part has a lot to do with the curiosity of what it would feel like to not be totally alone anymore. Not that I think me and these guys are going to become BFFs, despite what Hunter says. But it might be nice to have someone else in my life, besides an aunt, uncle, and cousin who hate me. And these guys seem okay with the whole murder thing, which should be a warning flag, but honestly, so am I.
Murderer.
Freak.
Monster.
Alone.
Alone.
Alone.
I skim my finger along the inside of my wrist, along the elevated scars. “Even if I agree to try to complete the task, I still don’t think I’m the right kind of girl to seduce a jock.”
“I can teach you a few things about seducing,” Hunter offers as he shoves his empty plate into the middle of the table. “I’ve been told I can be quite charming sometimes.” He winks at me.
“I’m sure you have.” I roll my eyes but then sigh. “But I think that kind of charm is a gift and can’t be taught.”
He dismisses me with a flick of his wrist. “You have it in you. You just need the opportunity to explore it a bit.”
I lift a brow. “And you’re gonna help me with that?”
He nods. “Absolutely.”
They momentarily fall into silence after that. I’m not sure what they’re waiting for. For me to agree to this task? For me to run out of the diner?
“So, do you accept the oath?” Jax finally asks, watching me closely.
Every part of my mind screams at me to say no. That I won’t be able to pull it off. That I don’t need to. That I’ve handled being by myself for years and can keep handling it.
But then I skim my fingers along my scars again, remembering the agony, the emptiness of each passing day, of not wanting to get up, of having nothing. And I’m tired of having nothing. I’m tired of being in pain. I’m tired of being tired.
Maybe I’m crazy for doing what I’m about to do. I have spent the last several years being told I’m crazy. So, I tell myself I’m just living up to