wasn't totally sure I cared enough about my ego to stop myself from following her. I would give it a beat though - no need for her to know I was utterly whipped. She probably already did though so did I even have a point to prove here?
“No,” he sighed. “It’s something I have to figure out myself. Why don’t you tell me what Liam is saying to you in those little meetings of yours that has you so out of sorts?” he suggested.
I ran a palm over my jaw and across the stubble lining it as I sighed. “I’m not entirely sure. But I’m getting the feeling he’s trying to prime me to take over from him when he dies.”
“Oh, is that all?” Saint asked dismissively and I frowned at him.
“You don’t think that’s a big deal?” I asked. “Because it seems to me like if he’s got that in mind for me, I’m never going to be allowed to leave this fucking house. I’m going to be forced into a role as his second and given more and more work for the family and I won’t have a choice about carrying it out. I’ll be an O’Brien from head to toe – exactly like they always planned for me to be and exactly like I never wanted to be.”
“Do you trust me?” Saint asked frankly and I knew it wasn’t a bullshit question.
“With my life,” I agreed fiercely.
“Then trust me when I tell you that your time as an O’Brien is running short. I will have you out of this organisation before long and the only family you will ever have to concern yourself with again will be ours. Of course, I cannot promise you that we’ll be law abiding citizens, but I get the feeling we might just be happy. So let’s aim for that.”
A thousand protests danced on my tongue, but I swallowed them back and nodded. If there was a man on this planet who could wrestle me from the clutches of Liam O’Brien, then it was Saint Memphis.
“Okay,” I agreed and he smiled.
Saint looked between me and the laptop for a long moment then slammed it shut with a growl of frustration.
"I can feel the answer to this encryption on the tip of my brain, but I can't quite coax it out. I just need to take a moment to turn my mind to something else, a different problem that needs fixing." His icy gaze fell on me like I was that problem and I frowned as I took a cigarette from a pack that had been left on the table as a part of the breakfast spread.
"Like what?" I asked, placing the smoke between my lips for a moment before drawing it out and looking down at it like I wasn't even sure how it had gotten there. This damn house and this damn family were getting under my skin. The longer I was here, the worse it was going to get.
I flicked the unlit cigarette into the fire with a sigh and swiped a hand down my face.
"You haven't spoken about Deepthroat since the day she died," Saint said calmly as he slid his laptop aside.
"What the fuck makes you think I'd want to talk about that stalking whore?" I snapped, wishing I hadn't tossed the damn smoke.
Saint gave me an assessing look before pouring the two of us fresh coffees and passing me mine.
"The night that Ashlynn slipped you a pill and escorted you back to her dorm-"
"So we're just going to have this conversation then, are we?" I asked, tensing as I prepared to get to my feet, my skin going all hot and prickly. I’d been blocking out thoughts about this shit for a good goddamn reason. "Regardless of my opinion on it?"
"I believe that you haven't dealt with what she did to you," Saint said, not reacting at all even though it must have been clear that I was damn tempted to rip his head off if he didn't shut the fuck up. Tatum had tried to have this conversation with me too and I’d tried to show her how fucking little that whore meant to me in place of discussing it. But in the back of my mind, I knew it wasn’t all that my wife deserved on the matter. And that killed me. It was just so fucking hard to face the issues I had surrounding Deepthroat. But I’d found ways to work around them.
"Tried to