I ordered from Aeropastale online.
Yeah, I know, I’m a traitor.
My hair is one long braid that tangled up days ago. I didn’t feel like dealing with it then no more than I do today.
“You smell and look awful, Erin,” she says, but still choosing to hug me a while longer. I miss her. I won’t lie.
She reminds me of the sisterly comfort I no longer have, the girl that Alek’s father, Sergey, found on the road and then left to die. The pang still hits me in the chest when I think about it, even after a week of vacationing from life.
“I know why you’re here. It’s not going to work. Go back and tell him to stop sending people over here,” I blurt out before she has the chance to say a word. She follows me into the living room where about twenty empty crunchy cheese doodle bags lie on the floor. I plop down on the couch, turn on the tv, and pretend to be interested in the old Marilyn Monroe movie that’s playing on the television.
“Alek didn’t send me, Erin. I swear it. He’d probably kill me if he knew I stopped by today.” She sits down on the couch across from me and glances around the room. “Can I at least open some blinds? I feel like a vampire is waiting to jump out and grab me.”
“I don’t care,” I answer, shrugging. She hops right up and opens my windows. The full blast of daylight hurts my eyes. That’s how long I’ve been sitting in the dark. “Well, if I do have vamps, then that light will definitely fuck them over.”
“You’re cursing again,” she responds, sitting down.
“So what? That’s what makes me feel most comfortable, okay? Everybody needs to stop trying to change me. If I want to go outside and scream out every curse word I know, then that’s my deal.”
What a bitch. She came over here to make you feel better and that’s how you treat her?
“I’m sorry,” I whisper and focus on my hands.
“Now that you’re done bitch-slapping me, I do want to say a few things,” Adriana answers. My head snaps back up, and I give her an incredulous look. No, scratch that, I’m fucking impressed.
“You just used profanity, Adriana. I don’t believe this.”
“Hey, in this business of glitz and glam and girls who stick tacks in the lining of your tutu, you have to be a little fiery. Either that, or you need to get the hell off the stage.” We both share a much needed laugh. She cracks me up in her attempts to use foul language.
“Okay, Adriana. I get your point.”
“You understand me in the same way as you do Alek,” she says quickly. The mood dampens, and I find myself wishing the vamps would come out and get her.
“Erin, I know he did something to screw up pretty badly. He has the world on his shoulders, though. Our parents made it this way, for both of us; but more so for him. Our lives have never been normal. You heard my mother that night she tortured you at the dinner table, she still arranges our dates.”
“Yeah, that’s pretty bad.”
“My brother hugs and kisses me all the time now. I don’t know what to think. I felt his forehead. I thought he was sick. He’s not normally this affectionate towards people,” she beams. Her hands are all over the place as she tells me this story. I can see how much she cares about Alek, and the thought touches me. “Please try to understand, Erin. All of this monogamy stuff is new to him. He’s so scared. And he’s not exactly the type to go telling people about things like that.”
“Things are more complicated than you realize, Adriana.”
“What difference does it make? You two care about each other. I’ll even be the one to say, I believe you’ve fallen for each other. But both of you are too stubborn and just more stubborn to admit it. Some people search a lifetime to find what you have with my brother. Look at my parents.” She mutters a string of words in Russian as she shakes her head.
“Are you cursing me out without telling me?” I ask, giving her a knowing side glance.
“Maybe,” she answers, but playfully rolls her eyes.
“What he—the things he told me…damn it.” I can’t get my thoughts together. Adriana’s the kind of person who knows how to work her way through the deepest parts of your resolve