on what must be a new cologne. My pussy clenches for the millionth time tonight … traitorous bitch. I tug at his shirt, desperate to have him closer.
“What are you doing?”
“Smelling you,” I admit. “Like you smelled me earlier.” I inhale once more, the effect just as dazzling as the first sniff.
“I was smelling the sweet essence of your pussy. Made me unbelievably hard. I wanted to pull those tease you call shorts aside and bury my dick deep between your thighs.”
“So why didn’t you?” I ask audaciously. I could bring up the fact that he said he wasn’t planning to ever fuck me again, but I keep that to myself.
“You’re drunk.”
“I’m horny.”
“Obviously.”
“So what are you going to do about it?” I palm his dick, and the hardness spurs me on. I feel powerful. “You know you want to fuck me.”
“Not a chance, sweetheart. My cock doesn’t have a say in who I fuck. I meant it when I said I wasn’t fucking you again. Especially not this drunken version of you. The alcohol is fueling this assertiveness.” He leans closer so that his mouth grazes my ear. “You’d regret it in the morning, and Melissa is waiting back at the campsite for me.”
His mention of the pawn’s name is like splashing ice water on my libido. The verbal slap is sobering and hurtful. I push him off me, ashamed of my lapse in judgment.
“Noted. We better get back then. Wouldn’t want to keep your girl waiting.”
Something indiscernible passes over his stupid face, but it’s gone in a flash. He shakes his head before turning to head in the direction he came. I follow in silence, pieces of my heart disintegrating with each step. The power I felt just seconds ago has withered into oblivion. I’m desperate to have it back. How could he be so dismissive?
I plot my revenge as we get closer to the group. I will make him feel the hurt that I feel—to know what that other shoe feels like. The guys are almost all packed up when we return. Lily runs over and gives me the biggest hug.
“You scared the shit out of me. I was only a few minutes behind you, so imagine my fear when I went to the house, and you weren’t there. Drunk and wandering off don’t mix. What if a serial killer had gotten to you?” Lily rambles when she’s nervous, but it’s part of her charm. It seems her imagination is just as creative as mine, too.
“I’m fine, Lil.”
She looks over at Phoenix, and I follow her gaze. He has his arm wrapped around a pouting Melissa. I look away. Game on.
“Psst.” Mitch summons me over as I wait for Killian and Ren to pack the cooler and blankets. I assume he wants to hit on me although he doesn’t have a snowball’s chance in hell. I’m not prepared for his advice.
“You’ll never get what you want standing on the sidelines, love. You have to show up, make your presence known, and take what you want. If not, the one willing to do what you aren’t gets the fish.”
He looks over at Phoenix and Melissa before walking away. The fish reference is peculiar, but I get what he’s saying. Somehow, he was able to piece together my feelings for Phoenix. In short, if I don’t put my bait on the line, Melissa will get the fish. Well, something along those lines. The question is … is he worth it? I’m not even sure what the hell I did wrong … Why should I put forth all the effort?
My stomach picks this moment to purge Jack. I bend over and hurl into the sand until dry heaves wrack my body. Lil is there in seconds to hold my hair, leaving a disapproving Asher to shoot daggers at me. I’ve managed to ignore him all night—too preoccupied with Phoenix. I wonder what he thought of his little lap dance. Asher walks over and hands me a paper towel he dipped in the ice water left over from the cooler.
“You need to learn your limits,” he suggests coarsely.
I wasn’t the only one drinking, so for him to single me out is progress. Minimum but noteworthy. His brotherly instincts are hidden but still intact. The coolness from the paper towel is refreshing. I nod Asher’s way but don’t answer as I walk slowly back to the house with Lily by my side. The moonlight reflecting off the ocean paints a serene picture. The